One of the hardest thing in a relationship with man is when he left you with no explanation all of a sudden. You are alone wondering what in world happen to him and unable to reach him. As if getting over him is not hard enough, the ghost risen up from death, as sudden as his leave.
You surely having a hard time figure out what to do when a guy ghosts you for him to randomly showing up, pretending as if nothing ever happen. At this situation, you must be thinking what to to when he ghosts you and comes back. No need to be flustered, those ghosts need to be treated in a good way to let him know what he really is.
1. Make Sure of What You Want
Before everything, you have to deal with your inner self first. The fact that he casually show up after a few weeks missing must've driven you crazy. Whether you are in a relationship or not, the fact that he has placed you on the back burner is just too much to be ignored. Do you want to take him back or you want get over him, make sure between one of those. It's how to lead a happy and peaceful life in a simple way.
2. Set Limit and Boundary
There are famous saying that people get treated the way they treat others. So that when he reach you first through calls or text, you don't have to response even if you have time. For someone who ghosts you, they deserve to be treated like a ghost as well. Limit yourself to be nice to him.
3. Stand Up for Yourself
No matter how hard you're shaken by his come back, you should stand up for yourself. Know your worth and what you want to do with him. Told him clearly and explicitly about what you want. If you want to give it a go for the second time, tell him what you expect from him. It's the same if you want to cut him off for good. There are many reasons why you don't need boyfriend to be happy anyway.
4. Take Time to Understand
Ghosts usually reach you through text first. What's written there is the most important. Read and reread it over and over again until you fully understand what does it mean. Take time as long as you want, until you become sure about what you want and what you're going to do next.
5. Think About Your Feeling
Once you figured about what the text mean, now it's time to think about how you feel about it. Your heart must be lighter if he mention about apology. But things could be irritating if all he says is "Hello" or "Hi". If he doesn't have any signs of boyfriend material you wish to have, then leave him for good.
6. Let Him Know What He's Done
If you have decided to response to him, take the opportunity to let him know about what he's done to you. So giving respons to him doesn't mean that you're taking him back. You can take this opportunity to find closure for yourself. Tell him how he has ghosted you all the time and how it hurt you.
7. Consider the Risk
The biggest question coming into your mind must be: "Will he ghost me again?" Taking him back is such a risky decision so you must consider this very carefully. Are you ready if the same thing happen again in the future? Or are you at least have the signs you are ready for a new relationship?
8. Take One Step at a Time
You finally come into decision to give it a try. Be very careful with every move you made and don't let the same thing happen again. You must prepare an umbrella before it's raining, preparing if he might ghost you again.
There are many reasons why a ghost come back to your life. Before you make any decision, it's good to find out why he come back.
A ghost is not always a bad person. He has been busy living his life all this time and he doesn't to want to disappoint you at the first place and he wasn't sure how to tell you. This kind of reason is pretty acceptable.
He is now ready for a commitment so that why he comes back. He finally made up his mind and want to things rightly this one time. However, you can read his intention by how he first reach you.
This is trash. This kind of guy clearly treats you as nothing. After he realize that no one's out there better than you, he shamelessly going back, pretending everything is alright like he has done nothing wrong.
Not every guy is born a good guy. In fact, some of them are dirty player. Be careful of this kind of person. Indeed he doesn't have any good intention toward you and all you can do is throwing him far away. He doesn't deserve another shot and don't consider giving him one.
You have to carefully think about what to do when he ghosts you and comes back. Even though you have been ghosted, it doesn't define who you are or make you less worthy. The people who run away like a ghost is the one who deserve someone who is sincere with her feeling like you. Whatever choice you make in the end, make sure it's best fr you and you won't regret it later.
Does it feel like pulling teeth getting him to say how he feels about you?
Some men can be very gaurded and closed when it comes to expressing how they feel - it can almost feel like they are pulling away from you. Many women make the mistake of pushing their man to say how they feel, but this is actually one of the worst things you can do as it can push him away further.
To get him to really show you how he feels and communicate how much he appreciates you, there's one simple thing, although often overlooked, thing you can say to him today that taps into how men are wired and can often lead to them suddenly pouring their heart out. My friend recorded a quick free video (click to watch) that shows exactly how to do that.