How to Tell Your Ex That You Don't Want to Be Friends

Last updated on June 4, 2022 by Michelle Devani

Having to overcome a break up itself is already a hard process to go through, but what if your ex boyfriend suddenly want to reconnect to you as a friend. There are maybe a ton of stuff that are running through your mind right now, you might haven't recover from the scar that left you broken but deep inside and decide that you can't have another interaction with him.

He will surely keep contacting your friends over and over to have a friendly relationship and you are just doesn't want that, you need to find a way to tell him that you doesn't want to be involved in any kind of drama anymore and you need to find it fast!. Don't worry, just do the usual, read through, do these steps that are listed below and you finally find your escape.

  1. Never Hesitate To Say No

If you already decided your mind that you don't want to be friend with your ex you must also say so. He might not be able to catch the point that you are trying to make him see, guys usually doesn't have the sharpest feeling when it comes to realizing something that he has done wrong.

If you keep trying to rationalize with your feelings which may still have been attached to him you will end up in position where you are trapped and will not be able to let go. You might also want to know the difference between him wanting a friendly relationship or a love filled one, read this article to know more about it How to Know if Your Ex Boyfriend Doesn’t Love You Anymore

2. Minimalize Contact 

The first thing that he will do to reconnect with you is of course trying to text or even call your phone, it is a rude behavior for you to ignore him, answer as short as possible and get straight to the point because you don't want to fall into his comfort zone again and again.

One of the way that you can also do to minimize the contact with him is by telling him that you are currently busy with something even you are not, this is done to make him stay away while knowing that he is a bother to you and make him stay away from you knowing that he is not welcomed by you. (read also: Here’s Five Ways to Tell Your Ex to Stop Contacting You Again)

3. Try Your Best To Avoid Him

If you ever been put in a unavoidable situation for example when you bump into him accidentally at work and he starting to approach to make a conversation with you, always state that you are in a hurry of doing something important and need to prioritize you need first. But make sure when you do that you do it politely, remember that you are trying to avoid being friends with him, not stating a war and make him you enemy.

4. Don't Go To The Place If You Know He Will Be There

It could be the coffee shop that you both use to tell stories to each other to, it could be a music festival of a band that you both like, even it could be a certain grocery store that you both used to shop at together. By avoiding the place that you used to went together with will decrease the frequency of both of you seeing each other again in that place automatically it will make a distance between the both of you and make him lose interest in you as you are to him. 

5. Unfollow All Of His Social Media

When he doesn't get any news from you what is the thing that he going to do when he want to know your latest update? By stalking all of your social media that is. When you decide to unfollow which will automatically blocked all of his access towards all of your social media. It will also give him a sign to back off from intervening his life with yours and make him give up all hope to befriend with you after the break up happened.

6.  Make Him Realize Via His Family and Mutual Friends That You Guys Are Befriend With

Like I have said before, guys usually didn't realize the mistake that they have made to you and carry out interacting with you as usual without realizing the damage that he have caused, he usually will tell stories to his friends and family about your break up and make them see that he is the one who is being hurt. Well, that is the story only according to his perspective but have they listened to your perspective?.

Make sure that that they do because it will save your reputation in front of his friend and family and make sure that your story is not a made up one to cover up for your mistake but is the truthful side of it. It will make his friend and family to be moved to give him advice that he is wrong and need to apologize to you for his mistake. (read also: Things to Say to Your Ex to Make Him Regret Leaving You in Pain) 

7. Be Honest With Him

When you want to avoid the situation where your boyfriend want to reconnect to you as a friend right after the break which not very advisable because you might be involved in a friendship which is filled with emotional mixed feelings.

If you are feeling that you are not ready to befriend with him, be upfront towards it tell him what are you currently feelings even though he will still approaching you right after you told him that you are not ready just do the same thing over and over and over until he understand. (read also: Things to Say to Your Ex When He Says He Misses You So Bad)

8. Complete Your Healing Process Before You Do Anything

This is the most important step of it all, I know it will take time to recover from a break up and while you are recovering towards it make sure you don't make any rash decision that can have a negative outcome.

Spend quality time with your friends and family because it can calm your heart and mind, spend time improving yourself doing things that can add knowledge and experience so you can have more brighter career opportunities, do whatever that can speed up your healing process and if you want to make him regret breaking up with you, you might want to read this article How to Make A Capricorn Man Regret After Breaking Up with You – Love Tips)

Does it feel like pulling teeth getting him to say how he feels about you?
Some men can be very guarded and closed when it comes to expressing how they feel - it can almost feel like they are pulling away from you and leaves you wondering whether he's actually into you.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.
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