How to be a Perfect Douchebag? A Filthy Tips for Jerks

Last updated on June 17, 2022 by Michelle Devani

Douchebag, a special species of men that a women naturally walk away from. Or they wish so, but they keep coming. Douchebag might be the ultimate version of jerks. However, women love bad boys, don’t they? To make them look more confident and attractive, men purposely act like a douchebag.

Who are these douchebag anyway? How to be a perfect douchebag?

There’s no manual and certain category that define a man as douchebag. But if you ask women what douchebag looks like, they’ll going to give you an endless list. Despite the nasty traits, douchebag is irresistibly charming women hard to reject.

Is there any way for men to be a perfect douchebag? Yes, it is. All you need to do is following the steps below.

  1. Don’t Text Back the Women You Slept with

After you sleep with someone, the woman expect you to text him right after. She wishes you’d text him “Thank you for last night” or something like that. It’s what a nice guy will do. But not if you want to be a douchebag.

Wait for at least six hours after, and go text her. If she texts you first – which in case most women will do, since they can’t wait for you any longer – wait the exact same time before sending your reply. Also read Reasons on Why Do Girls Like Douchebags

  1. Brag About the Women Who Chased You

An undeniable character of a douchebag is that he is wanted by many women. It makes douchebags more interesting. Seeing how many women are around you, the one you fall for (or pretend to be) must be special.

Douchebags also love to brag about the women who chased them, either to make you jealous or to make them look cool. That way, she’ll become more competitive and work even harder to win your heart.

  1. Pursue a Woman Until She Falls for You, But Leave Her After That

If a woman is asked why she likes douchebag, she’ll say that she loves to be chased. A douchebag can chase a woman like crazy that she feels she’s the only one. Women like to play hard to get even when they have fallen in love.

Never give up on chasing her, then leave her alone once she said she love you. Brutal, right? Well, douchebags are never nice anyway. Also read Things to Say to Your Boyfriend When He's Being A Jerk

  1. Texts a few Girls at the Same Time

The perks of being a douchebags are they have bunches of girls to text every night and they can reply whoever they want and leave the ones they don’t want to.

Don’t need to text lengthy words, just simple “Good night” will swoon the girls off their feet. Unfortunately, even though you’re the one who texted first, not all of them will get reply.

  1. Tell Her How You’re Not Happy All These Time

Appearing as someone vulnerable and helpless is the way how be a perfect douchebag. You play innocent in front of women, explaining from A to Z about how you are wronged by many people that you fall in this situation.

You’re not happy because you’re too nice and no one deserves you. Thus, you’re looking for someone who fully understand you. Also read How to Deal with A Very Shy Girl?

  1. Make Up Stories About How “Kind” You are

The best way to attract women are by gaining their sympathy. After convince them about your unhappy situation, don’t forget to make up stories about the friends who always take advantages from you, but you have no choice since they are your friends.

It’s how you build a vulnerable image, someone that need to be fixed. Women like to appear as heroine themselves.

  1. Shoot Her to the Sky with Compliment

Who in the world that don’t like to be complimented? Women knows that all the sweet things come out of a douchebag’s mouth are fake, but they enjoy it howsoever.

You can start by stating how pretty she looks to their positive behavior, and finally describing every little thing of her that would make her the best girlfriend for you. Also read Ways to Flirt Without Coming On Too Strong

  1. Cancel the Date Last Minute

Douchebags are not nice guys, so don’t bother to be one. Cancelling the date last minute is something a gentleman wouldn’t do, but douchebag always does. After getting her excited the whole week, anticipating the date, you call her just the day before saying that you have an emergency you can’t leave.

Add the regretful tone in your voice. She’ll be annoyed to hell, for sure, but the next time you call, she’ll pick it up on the first ring.

  1. Don’t Take Picture with Her

A douchebag acts like an exclusive person who’s hard to take picture with. It’s okay to take group pictures where you appear with number of others, but never take shots of just the two of you.

You can’t make it looks like you belong to certain person, so that when another woman checks you tagged photos, they won’t find anything suspicious. Also read How to Know You Are Dating a Player

  1. Make Her Laugh Her Heart Off

Laugh and love are close that people fall in love easily when they’re happy. Throw funny jokes to her that she thinks you’re a fun person to be with. Make jokes about yourself or somebody around you.

  1. Be On Your Phone All the Time

A douchebag always looks busy. It’s what you have to do. When you’re together with her, check your phone every five minutes, arise from your seat every thirty minutes and step outside. It would piss her

You just landed on a few useful tips on how to be a perfect douchebag. Remember that you have to be bold, as douchebag is never nice. You have to do mean things and hurt women every time. If you’re not really ready, you better not trying to be one.

Want him to chase, love and obsess over you?
Well, you’ll need to have a much deeper understanding of a thing called the 'hero instinct' which is one of the fundamental drivers behind the behaviour of all men. Once you use that to your advantage, you'll finaly become the most important priority in his life. My friend James Bauer prepared this Quick Free Video that'll teach you to utilize this to your advantage.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.