Best Ways How to Talk to Your Crush If You are a Gay and He's Straight

Last updated on June 9, 2024 by Michelle Devani

You can have crush on anyone, whether it’s to the same sex as yours or to the opposite sex. Problem is, what if your crush is straight but you are gay? It puts you in a dilemma as you want to talk to them but you also worry in case they run away when they know about your sexuality.

So how to talk to your crush if you are a gay and he’s straight? Is it impossible to get close to him? Is there any way for him to be comfortable with me? Sure, it is. There must be solutions to every problem.

First thing you should know is that it’s pretty common for gays to develop crush to straight men. While the prospect of being in a relationship with him remains blurry, at least you can get closer to him.

  1. Ask a Therapist

This is probably the first and the best thing you can do. Especially when you live in a conservative community, you have to be careful with every steps you take. Find therapist to discuss about your problem, including your crush who is a straight guy.

They can help you to find better way to communicate with him, without making him worry or afraid of you. Also read How to Tell Someone You're Gay Without Saying It

  1. Be His Friend

If he is not your friend, then you can start to get close by being his friend. Start it without intention of having relationship with him since it might trouble you later. As long as you can keep your manner, it will be okay.

Not that you have to conceal your true self, but you’re being careful here since you never know how would he react if he knows that you’re a gay.

  1. Share Interests with Him

Just like how any other boys grow close to each other, they usually share common interests. So this is what you can do. Find what’s his interests and see if you have something in common with him.

If you don’t, try to like one of his interests so you have something to talk about and do together. Thinking of it, wouldn’t it be really fun? Also read Best Dating App for Gay Relationship

  1. Avoid Becoming Demanding of Him

Another way how to talk to your crush if you are a gay and he’s straight. You have to control the way you behave to him. For example when you text him and it took hours for him to reply, just patiently wait.

No need to text him over and over again to make him reply sooner. It will make him uncomfortable and eventually he grows suspicious on you.

  1. Prepare Yourself for the Worst

So you know from the beginning that he’s a straight, don’t let yourself expect too much from him. The worst thing that could happen is he’ll be running away from you as soon as he know you have crush on him.

This is why it’s important for you to prepare for this. So you won’t be too depressed when it happens. Also read What Do I Do When My Crush Likes My Best Friend?

  1. Forget and Let Go

If you think the chance is really small, maybe the best thing is for you to walk away before your feeling grows deeper. This is indeed easier said than done, but moving on is a process you have to get through to prevent the worst heartbreak.

  1. Talk to Your Friends

If you really don’t know what to do and you don’t want to talk it to a therapist, then you could ask your best friend about it. They will listen to you sincerely and give you the best answers possible. Even if they don’t, you’re going to feel your burden is lighter.

If you are not comfortable with your friends, you can tell either your parents or sibling if they know your condition and they are okay with that. Sometimes other persons can help you put things in perspective. Also read Ways to Make Your Best Friends Feel Better

  1. Don’t Force Him to Change His Sexuality

No matter how much you like him, never try to change his sexuality. You have to respect their orientation and accepting that both of you are going onto different directions. If you ever try to change him, it could lead you to even bigger disappointment.

  1. Keep Yourself Busy

If he occupies your mind too much, you should drive your attention to something else. Try not to think about him all the time by doing other activities, find new hobbies, etc. That way you can avoid being obsessed with him.

So those are the ways how to talk to your crush if you are a gay and he’s straight. If you got any other ways, share with others through the comment section below.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.
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