How To Tell Your Boyfriend You've Never Been Kissed Before

Last updated on July 6, 2024 by Michelle Devani

When you’re dating, you can’t stay away from hugging, cuddling, and eventually kissing. All those intimate contact comes in a package with the relationship. Kissing is especially a moment awaited by many couples, since it’s the moment they seal their love. But how to tell your boyfriend you’ve never been kissed before?

If you’re still in your teens it doesn’t matter. Probably you’re his first girlfriend too. This might get more complicated when you’re on your twenties and you’ve never been kissed, regardless of you have dated before or not. Many women it drops down your dignity if you ever tell your boyfriend you’ve never been kissed. Come on, you’re not Virgin Mary.

But never been kissed by someone doesn’t mean you’re not attractive or shameful. Here are some tips how to tell your boyfriend you’ve never been kissed before without feeling inferior.

Also read: How to Kiss Perfectly Step by Step For Beginners


1. Never Been Kissed Is Not A Shame

If you have never been kissed, does it mean you’re not attractive? Does it mean you have some serious complex? Not at all. Why feel ashamed? Not having your first kiss yet despite you being on your twenties or more is not something to be ashamed of. 

2. Don’t Feel Inferior In Front Of Him

don't feel inferior in front of him

Yes, this is it. While most of your friends has number of kissing experience under their belt or even have been swept up from their feet, here you are standing innocently. There’s nothing wrong with that. This is what you must understand.

Say that you date someone who has a few exes behind him, which means he’s experienced, never feel that you’re no equal with him. In fact, you must think yourself special. Being someone’s first kiss is not a chance that come everyday.

Also read: How to Tell Your Boyfriend You Want to Kiss Him Over Text

Everyone has their own issues and situations. It’s not fair to judge them over petty things. Also, if you find him laughing at you after telling this, that’s enough proof that he’s not worthy.

3. Realize That It’s Never A Big Deal

Kissing doesn’t mean anything. You can date someone for a long time but he never land his lips on yours, why? Because you’re too precious. Kissing everyday doesn’t proof that he loves you.

All that matters in the cake of a relationship is the feeling you have for one another. Kissing? It’s just an icing on the top. Even without it, the cake is still tasty. Don’t let it tricks you.

4. Don’t Feel Burdensome

don't feel burdensome

You don’t have to tell him about the virginity of your lips if you don’t want to, but you better tell him for some reason. If he’s about to kiss you or sending signals that he’s going to, telling him is the wise choice. So he won’t expect you to do more than he could and even better if he teach you how to! 

Also read: How to Tell Your Boyfriend That He's a Bad Kisser

5. No Need To Practice In Advance

We have told you that kissing is not a big deal, right? Never practice the speech you’re going to use on him, ever. In most cases, practice makes perfect but this is definitely not one of them.

Don’t practice the kiss, either. First kiss should be an unforgettable experience, not something that stress you out. Let everything go with the flow. If you are meant to be kissed, you will.

6. Be Casual When You Tell Him

If you want to know the best way how to tell your boyfriend you’ve never been kissed, be casual with your words, your tone, and the situation. Let him know that you’re confident enough not to take it as a big deal.

Here are some ideal situation to tell him: when you’re watching romantic movie at home and kissing scene appears. Say casually “I’ve never been there before” and everything proceed from there. 

Also read: Tips to Keep Your Man Happy in A Relationship

Another situation: you’re dining out and next table is kissing passionately. You can tell him using ventriloquist (so that no one but him can hear) that you’ve never been kissed. Keeping it light and casual is the key.

7. Don’t Hesitate Too Much

don't hesitate too much

What does never been kissed make you? It doesn’t define anything about you so you don’t have to put so much thought on it. What about taking it the other way around? Instead of judging you of being unattractive, you boyfriend will feel honored as the first person who kiss you.

8. Don’t Act Like You’ve Experienced

You can choose not to tell him but you shouldn’t act like you’re experienced either. Honesty in every little thing is the most important thing in a relationship—starting from the smallest ones. He’ll know if you lied, and it’s not his fault if it changes the way he thinks about you.

That you’ve never been kissed doesn’t matter. The fact that you lied does. 

Also read: Does Telling Little White Lies Causing Big Problems In Relationship?

9. You Don’t Have To Tell Him Why

In case you feel burdensome upon telling him because you’re afraid he might asks you questions you don’t want to answer, don’t be. You have the right not to tell him why. Everyone has their own reasons. If he really cares about you, he’ll respect your choice. He’ll understand that you don’t want to tell him because he knows you’ll open up when you’re ready.

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10. Don’t Let It Change The Way You Feel About Him

As been well said before, kissing is like the icing on a cake. If it’s not there, the taste of the cake won’t change. It’s the same when you haven’t been kissed but you have dated before. If your boyfriend hasn’t kiss you, don’t let it change your feeling about him. You are precious that not any guy can land his lips on you. Stress it to yourself rather than feeling minor because of it. You are worthy.

Many women and girls often feel ashamed when they’re still virgin or never been kissed while everyone around them has. In fact, kissing all the guy you’ve dated or you’re not is not cool at all. Yes, you’re different but in a unique way. You love and value yourself more than anything.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.
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