Signs of a Shy Girl Having a Crush on You (33 Not So Obvious Signs)

by Michelle Devani

Do you have a crush on a shy girl? 

Does it feel impossible to tell whether she feels the same way about you? 

This is pretty common as shy women are even more subtle than normal when it comes to showing signs of attraction. 

However, they do show signs. You just need to know what to look for. 

That’s why I have filled this guide with 33 clear signs that a shy girl has a crush on you. 

Let me begin this guide with a warning though.

Even if this woman is attracted to you, be careful not to come on too strong when you begin flirting with her. 

This warning applies whether she’s shy or not!

Women hate when a man makes his attraction to her too obvious. It ruins the thrill of the chase for her. It takes away any excitement from the courtship. Worse still, it would make her feel cheap and slutty if she were to let anything happen between you.

That’s why I want to share this guide on ‘Stealth Attraction’. It brilliantly explains a technique that’ll help you flirt with women in a manner that doesn’t scare them away. 

This guide will help you to consistently ensure that something happens between you and the women you’re attracted to. As such, it’s surely a must-read for all men.  

With that said, let’s now explore the signs that shy women show when they’re attracted to men.

Contents

33 Signs a Shy Girl Likes You

The closest to ‘sure’ you can be about how someone feels about you is what they tell you. As far as signs go, it’s one of the most expressive and hardest to miss. However, if that’s all your crush detection radar is tuned to, you will definitely miss out on more than a few prospects, especially with shy girls.

Now, we all know an average girl is generally not as hands-on when she likes someone as a guy might be. We’ve also had less practice at rejection, so it tends to hit us harder than our male counterparts too. All the more reason why girls guard it jealously when they start to like a guy.

Add to that a sprinkle of shyness, and the plot thickens. However, in addition to your sixth sense, you should be able to tell if a shy girl likes you by the following signs:

1. She stares at you a lot but generally avoids your eyes

You've caught her staring so often that you can sometimes feel her eyes on you before even turning to look. When you do turn, she averts her gaze with quickness. It’s not just your face she fixates on either, it’s as much of you as she can take in.

A shy girl who has a crush on you can go out of her way to get coffee from your favorite place so she can gawk at you every morning… until you ruin it by staring back. While you probably wonder why she won't just say hi, she’s doing internal flips over a detour well spent because she got the chance to see you again.

2. She goes weak at the knees when you make eye contact

Once you start catching on to her pattern of staring and looking away, it becomes harder for her to get away with it. So, the bigger a crush she has on you, the more likely she is to forget herself in her gaze; and get caught

Shy girls generally don’t do well with eye contact, which might explain why she acts like your eyes are her kryptonite. Or it could just be that they actually are. How to tell? Easy. Notice how she gets flustered when you lock eyes. Not only will she always be the first one to look away, her face and skin may also flush in embarrassment. 

3. She blushes a lot around you

she blushes a lot around you

Skin flushing, being one of the most pristine body language signs of attraction, should give your shy girl away. Like I just explained, making eye contact with you will almost always make her blush, whether you mean to or just look over to her side while talking to someone else.

Likewise when you accidentally brush her on your way, or literally whenever exciting or embarrassing thoughts of you cross her mind. Of course, it can also mean she eats spicy food or is more sensitive to temperature changes, but if you can rule those out and she flushes more around you, she probably fancies you. 

4. You are really funny to her

You could have a fairly good sense of humor or be as funny as jack, if a shy girl likes you, she’ll find what you say and do interesting nonetheless. She may not laugh out loud at all your jokes, so she doesn’t give herself away, but if she smiles or pays rapt attention, it’s still a good sign.

It’s not so much that everything goes with her as seizing every opportunity to make you feel good about yourself. She’s lowkey signaling her interest in you by relating with not just what others like about you but also the ones they may not appreciate enough.

5. Her friends tease her with you

One thing you should probably know about shy girls is that they like to surround themselves with people of a more varied personality. Their posse doesn’t always consist of timid worrywarts like themself. Where she is quiet and reserved, she’ll have friends who are more outgoing and in your face.

If that describes your shy girl’s group of friends, how they behave with you is another possible sign. For instance, if they stop talking when you walk by or all but your babe look over to your side and titters, they probably use you to poke fun at her.

6. She smiles sheepishly around you

Smiling is a top-tier body language sign that a girl likes you, irrespective of where she falls on the outgoing spectrum. However, where an extroverted one might try to reel you in with more of a come-hither type smile, a shy girl’s own will more likely come across as sheepish.

This is because half the time she smiles at you, she only realizes she’s doing so after the fact. She may not always get full-fledged doe-eyed, but it’s as if her lips have a mind of their own when you walk into the room or, worse, talk to her.

7. She acts aloof towards you

On the other hand, some shy girls go the other way around when they have a crush on you by acting cold. For instance, if she talks to other guys, but not you, it's not always because she thinks she's too cool for you. If anything, it's that she's convinced she's not cool enough. 

She keeps her distance to avoid showing her hand or saying something wrong around you. You may see her as this sublime girl, but if imposter syndrome has her feeling inadequate, she might stay away lest you see her for the fraud she thinks she is.

8. You flow more over the phone than in person

Shy girls may not have the courage to get your attention by flirting in person, however, they make great text buddies. If a shy girl likes you and you somehow get to talking over the phone, she'd be like a whole different person. 

The relative anonymity being behind a screen affords her takes away most of the usual awkwardness that comes with interacting with her. She’s more in her element when texting than talking in person because the reduced pressure evens out the playground. 

In sum, she will likely settle into your rapport and reveal different sides to her sooner over the phone than in person if she has a crush on you.

9. You think she likes you but she's never proactive about it

A shy girl would rather stay by the phone refreshing intermittently to see if a message from you comes in than text first. She won't ask you out on a date or make spontaneous romantic gestures even if you've been chatting a while for fear of pushing it.

You can see several positive signs suggesting she might be into you (and be right about them), and she still wouldn’t make the first move. Since such inconsistent behavior can be confusing, sometimes the best you’ve got to go besides the body language tells is the almost palpable chemistry you have. 

10. She's super attentive to you

An average shy girl with a crush isn’t just a prospective girlfriend but also a potential good friend. Having been in the background practically forever, she tends to be more observant than most, which translates to attentiveness when she’s interested in something. She enjoys being by herself but will take time out to talk or hang if you ask.

She’s more interested in you than opening up about herself, so more time to have you be the center of attention when you interact. She listens so well that she can pick up on what others will easily miss, even things you don’t say. And the best part? All this comes easy to her when she likes you, so you won’t ever feel like she’s doing it out of obligation. 

11. She puts the littlest details she learns about you to good use

Now, all that attentiveness isn’t because shy girls don’t have much better things to do with their time, it’s the way they know how to connect. She holds on to the stuff you share with her not because she has more memory space to spare than the next girl, but so she can use it to impress you later on.

If a shy girl randomly gets you something she knows you enjoy, like snacks, or hers is always one of the most thoughtful gifts you receive on your birthday, there’s your sign. She might also interact with you more in your love language, even if you only mentioned something remotely close to it once in passing. 

12. Her body language gives her away

her body language give her away

From tics like fiddling with her hair to pointing her feet towards you when together, most of the signs a shy girl likes you will be evident in her body language. Many of these cues are unconscious, even the more common ones like smiling and the staring thing, so she mostly won’t be able to help it. 

Biting her lips, fumbling over her words, and leaning closer to you are some other body language signs a shy girl likes you. Add to that those that correlate with proximity like quickened breathing, sheepish grin, and breathy voice (depending on the effect you have on her), and you may be on to something. 

13. Accidental touches followed by an apology

Another body language flirting practice a shy girl might adopt if she likes you is to touch you now and again ‘by mistake’ then apologize. Nothing crazy or awfully inappropriate though, not just because she can’t risk being so forward, but reserved people tend to appreciate the concept of personal boundaries more.

That being said, does she let her finger linger a little longer than necessary when she passes you something or brush your hand ever so slightly now and again? Those are substantial flirting signs in shy girls.

14. She starts putting more effort into her appearance

Needless to say, a girl taking care of herself doesn’t always have to do with guys. Nevertheless, it’s also natural to want to look your best for a crush, making it such a reliable tell. If you’re looking for more visible signs a shy girl likes you, pay attention to her appearance.

Does she suddenly style her hair differently, wear more form-fitting outfits, or put on more makeup? Girls decide to switch it up all the time, so it might be nothing. However, if the timeline follows when you started noticing other signs on this list, it’s probably less coincidence and more like she’s totally into you.

15. She's an ardent, if not muted, fan of yours

You may not exchange more than a few words on average in person, but she's there when you need people to be. Whether it's at a school debate or a show you're performing in, a shy girl who likes you wouldn't miss it for the world. This energy can be felt online, too, in how she interacts with your social media posts. 

She may not comment something overtly sexual or remotely romantic, but you'll have her like on every post. Although some shy girls can just as easily go the other way and not interact with any of your posts, so they don’t give stalker vibes. The point remains if there's ever a need for people to rally around you, you can count on a shy girl to show up if she likes you.

16. Multiple accidental run-ins

Talk about stalking, do you occasionally run into this girl somewhere you usually hang out but wouldn’t expect her to be? Maybe a little bird tells are where you are going to be, or she just really likes to hang around boys’ clubs or something.

It could be a coincidence that she and her friends just always happen to be at parties you attend even though you run in different circles. Or it could be seamlessly arranged strategic positioning, something even I, an inbetweener, would do if I was lowkey trying to get in a guy’s face more. But I wouldn’t do that for a random classmate or colleague, nor would a shy girl so fill in the blanks.

17. She offers to help

Acts of service as a sign of romantic interest in someone isn’t just a guy thing, girls do it too. A shy girl might jump at this, particularly among other forms of expression, because she stands to gain so much from it by doing relatively little. Going by the most cliché example in the books, say she’s a total nerd who offers to help with your assignment or lighten your workload.

The time she and brainpower she expends on the task pale compared to the satisfaction of filling your need and spending time with you. Though the ‘selfish’ motives may not consciously drive her, if she’s there for you literally every time, even without you asking, including when it’s inconvenient, chances are there’s more to her selflessness. 

18. She's cool with your friends

Keep in mind that there are levels to this shy thing; some girls are only awkward around guys they have a crush on, while it’s boys or people in general for others. If your possible admirer usually tilts more towards the latter side of the spectrum but suddenly finds the courage to get acquainted with your buddies, that could be a sign.

Interacting with them may not be the easiest thing for her, but it’s nothing compared to the anxiety of approaching you directly. Plus, she knows her odds are a lot better with you if your friends approve of her. So, if she gets cozy with practically everyone in your clique but you, it’s a sign she’s looking for an in without necessarily risking rejection.

19. Her wingwoman(man) tries to befriend you

On the flip side, every shy girl has that one friend (at least) eager to get her ass into an actual relationship. If she has a crush on you, not only would that person know, they’d probably play an active role in getting her to see it through as well. That’s the person to watch for this particular sign.

Whether it’s her best girls or a single girlfriend, her wingman may suddenly start to make nice with you instead of the shy girl ‘infiltrating’ your circle. It may not be more than pleasantries at first, but they’ll seize the opportunity to naturally put in a good word for shrinking violet when they get it.

20. She tries to learn more about you every chance she gets

An infatuated girl never gets tired of learning about her crush. If she spares no resource in getting to know you more, it’s one of the signs a shy girl likes you. Not just from your friends, but wherever she can get info like off your Insta, Facebook, or whichever SM you’re more expressive on.

If you say more than hi and bye to each other, chances are you guys will talk about you more than you do about her. A shy girl likes you if she probes you or your friends for intimate details about you because why would she care otherwise?

21. She listens more than she talks

When a shy girl likes you, not only will she not talk about herself as readily as she’ll want to discuss you, she also may not get as many words in altogether. No, this doesn’t automatically make you a narcissist, leave it to a shy girl to methodically shift attention away from her.

She may eventually open up more as your relationship grows more intimate, but somehow that would feel less urgent as long as her crush has her fascinated. To her, talking about herself is a waste of a precious chance to digest as much as she can get you to reveal about yourself.

22. You have deep and meaningful conversations

you have deep and meaningful conversation

Where bolder girls may play to their physical strengths, shy girls tend to be more confident in their mental capacity. You may have people you talk to regularly, but you find it easier to go broad and deep with this girl. 

The truth is, once the initial small talk hurdle has passed, shy girls can carry conversations so well because of all that attention they pay you. Information from stalking your social media, playing detective with your friends, as well as what they notice from observing you all give them an idea of what you’d like to discuss. Talk about doing your homework.

23. She pays you specific compliments

If you get a lot of compliments from girls, this one might be hard to spot – or miss if you are attentive. Where most of the usual stuff you hear either has to do with your body, how you dress, or something equally generic, a shy girl might be more specific.

If she says things like how your eyes sync with your lips when you smile or coyly mentions a haircut even you wouldn’t notice on another person, she likes you.

24. She goes out of her comfort zone for you

It takes some time for a shy girl to get comfortable enough with you to get out of her shell and explore the other side more. Naturally, her own company is her comfort zone, and outside her obligations, it takes some incentive to get her out of it. 

When you think of it that way, you realize it’s not the just wild parties that count. Going out of her way to get coffee from the place near you and actually talking to your friends to find out if you have a girlfriend are also signs a shy girl likes you. Just as long as you have other hints to work off of.

25. Her voice changes when you are around

Like with other body language signs, you can tell if a shy girl likes you by paying attention to the pitch of her voice when you're within earshot. Just as women are evolutionarily programmed to find men with lower-pitched voices more capable, you may also find her more attractive vice-versa.

Girls generally project at a higher pitch than guys, but if she likes you, her voice may come out even tinier than usual around you. Though it’s totally possible to adjust, that initial higher-pitched projection being her body’s natural reaction to the butterflies in her belly is enough to take away.

26. She's more expressive with her friends around

Here is a sign you might be able to relate with, seeing as how guys do it all the time: drawing strength from your wingmen to talk to your crush. Depending on how mature her friends are, all you might notice about them at first could be the teasing thing.

However, if you look back at the unique situations you’ve been in with your shy girl, you just might realize they do more than tease her with you. Take the ‘accidental run-ins, for instance, they will probably be in a corner somewhere cheering her on or distracting your entourage, so she can get her five seconds alone with you.

27. Preening

Preening is another one in the long list of body language signs that might suggest a shy girl has a crush on you. Like a bird with its feathers, if she can’t spend five minutes in your company without trying to enhance or fix her appearance, she’s probably got it bad for you.

You know how we naturally get self-conscious around someone we like? Add that to an average shy girl’s personal struggle with being the focus and it’s like she’s under the microscope. Does she touch up her makeup now and again, or straighten her dress every time you look away? A working theory is that she wants to check as many boxes as she can on your list.

28. She still gets nervous around you

Most of the body language signs a shy girl likes you point to nervousness. Blushing, lip biting, tonal inconsistencies, compulsively adjusting hair and face, and several other related ones like that all happen because crushes make everyone nervous, not just shy girls.

And because many of these body language cues occur unconsciously, you may continue to notice them even after you two have broken the ice. Like you can chat or occasionally hang (if in a group), and your infatuated shy girl would still turn red when it's just you and her.

29. She mirrors your mannerisms

More on reading body language signals, they say we subconsciously copy and mimic the movements of someone we like when we engage them. It all comes back to the attentiveness we’ve been going on about so far, which explains why it works with shy girls.

Just for trips, try this little test on her when next you see her: lean over or touch your face mid-conversation, if she does the same, she probably likes you. If on top of that, she also adapts the way you talk, then she’s likely more into you than whatever topic is being discussed.

30. She feels the need to explain her relationship with other guys

Usually, it’s a good sign if someone you like gets jealous when they see you with potential competition, but a smitten shy girl may not want to take that risk. Though she may not be considering a full-blown relationship with you yet, she also wouldn’t want a misunderstanding to annihilate her chances prematurely.

So, if you see her with a male friend and she works into conversation later about how he’s ‘just a friend,’ consider it a hint at just how single and ready to mingle she is. For you, at least. 

31. She keeps your secret

Not only is a hooked shy girl easy to talk to, the fact that she’d also be looking to stay in your good books means she won’t willingly sell you out. You can confide in her not because she doesn’t have people to reveal your secret to, but she wouldn’t want to lose your trust.

So if she’s usually a straight arrow but has caught you cheating on a test or doing something equally unscrupulous without reporting, it might be worth looking into how she feels about you.

32. You can just tell you're important to her

you can just tell you're important to her

From the way her eyes sparkle when you walk in just before she glances away to how she prioritizes you time and again, you can tell you’re pretty high on her list. Even if she’s naturally more empathetic than others, your gut will tell you this one considers you more than a friend.

It would be unrealistic for her to put as much thought into her interaction with everyone as she does with a crush. Hence, if the points suggest you’re special to her, that’s probably because it’s true.

33. She's shyer than usual around you

Tl;dr? If a shy girl likes you, she will act shyer around you relative to other guys/people. She will likely step out of her comfort zone and explore uncharted territories more for and with you. She may put more effort into her appearance and be more attentive to you.

She may also stay up to date on the happenings in your life and perhaps enlist her close friends’ help to get your attention. All in all, between her body language and your gut feeling, you will definitely pick up on the hints if a shy girl likes you.

FAQs

How do you know if a shy girl is crushing on you?

You can tell a shy girl has a crush on you if she acts more nervous or flustered around you than usual. She’ll find you fascinating no matter how boring you are and be more attentive to you and your needs than a regular friend would. She may also stare a lot, but avoid making contact with your eyes.

How does a shy girl show interest?

A shy girl shows she likes a guy by taking an interest in the important and minute details about him. She may ask questions to get him to open up, hold on to what she learns, and use them to optimize her interactions with him later on. She may also step of her elements more if it ups her chance of getting with her crush.

How to tell if a girl is shy?

Shy people generally take longer to warm up to others than their more outgoing counterpart. If a girl is shy, you can see the timidness in her eyes and perhaps even hear it in her voice when she speaks.

How do you make a girl miss you?

The most surefire way to make someone miss you is to make yourself less available to them. If you want a girl to miss you, get more of the mystery you may have lost to familiarity back by limiting her access to you. When your presence stops choking her, it’s only a matter of time before she realizes you’re no longer there. 

How do you tell if a girl thinks you’re cute?

A girl who thinks you are cute will probably let her eyes linger when she stares and probably blush or flush if you notice. She might put more effort into her appearance also to match your level of attractiveness. She could also go the other way and tease you non-stop about how pretty you are or flirt with you more.

In Summary

The truth is, there is no one way to tell for sure if a shy girl likes you, especially since coming straight out to say it is usually out of the equation. However, knowing what signs – body language and verbal – to look out for you helps trace the smoke to the fire more times than not. As usual, don’t forget to leave a comment and share this post if you enjoyed it or found it helpful.

Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.

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