What If I Want To Lose My Virginity But I Don't Have A Boyfriend

Last updated on February 6, 2024 by Michelle Devani

Sex and virginity are always sensitive topics for women. Somebody wants to lose their virginity at one point while others prefer keep it until their marriage. People have their own choice. Maybe you are included in the first ones, but you just don’t know how or you don’t have a boyfriend to give your virginity too.

So, “What if I want to lose my virginity but I don’t have a boyfriend?” question must be popped up in your mind.

If you are in that condition, what you should really do. Because, yes, the desire to have sex is often unbearable and probably drive you crazy. Here are some ways to make you a little calmer.


1. Maybe You Should Wait A Little Longer

The first option you can do: wait. Why the urge to lose your virginity while you can keep it? Remember that losing your virginity is not cool. It’s a bit risky instead. You can always fall to the wrong guy, having a bad experience or get infected with STD. Maybe there’s a silver lining you should look for.

Also read: What Happen If You Lose Your Virginity Before 22?

2. Don’t Give Your Virginity To Random Guy

don't give your virginity to random guy

Waiting means you can’t give your virginity to random guys. And just don’t. By now you probably have read that you don’t need a boyfriend to lose your virginity—you can look for a hookup. But hookups is not for first timers. You’d be disappointed of how there’s no affection and hookup and maybe left thinking that sex is suck. You don’t want it for sure.

3. Don’t Push Yourself To Find A Boyfriend

Here is another thing. Waiting is better. If you want to find a boyfriend just because you want sex, you may end up meeting the wrong guy. Take virginity as something precious so you can give it to the right person. You don’t need to find random guy and make him your boyfriend just because of this reason. 

Also read: How Do You Know When You're Ready to Lose Your Virginity?

4. Save It For Your Marriage

There also could be a good reason why you don’t have a boyfriend when you want to lose your virginity. You can save it for your marriage later. You have to trust that losing your virginity is not something cool or something to be bragged about. In fact, you might regret it if become something you don’t expect.

5. Look For A Distraction

If your mind are so occupied with the “What if I want to lose my virginity but I don’t have a boyfriend?” question, all you need is distraction. Do something else so that you don’t have time to think about it. Find new hobbies, do what you love and other things that can keep you busy. 

6. You Can Get Over With It

Trust yourself that you can get over with it. If it comes only once in a while, it’s not hard to ignore. But if you think about it too hard, it may affects your daily life. And it’s not worth it. Try to move on and get over with it. We don’t get everything we want, anyway. Things happen for good reason. If it’s not now, probably you will find out later.

7. Don’t Feel Stupid

Why do you want to lose your virginity? You should ask yourself about this first before thinking how to lose it while you don’t have a boyfriend. Don’t feel stupid just because your friends have done it and you’re the only one hasn’t. Nobody looks stupid just because they’re still a virgin, and if your environment makes you look so, then you’re in the wrong place. Virginity has nothing to do with your personality and achievement. 

Also read: What Does It Mean When Your Boyfriend Doesn't Want to Sleep with You

8. You’re Not Left Out

You can feel left out when all your friends are not virgin. You’re the only virgin of the lot and you feel like you don’t belong there when they start talking about sex. Really, is sex the only thing you can talk about? Surely not.

Losing your virginity just because of social pressure or just so you’re equal with your friends is not cool at all. In fact, you meet the wrong friends. Virginity shouldn’t be taken as something to make friends with.

9. Don’t Be Embarrassed

Why the embarrassment? Don’t let others control your mind and your mind. Do you realize that when you want to lose your virginity because your other friends have done it or because you are on legal age is crazy. Virginity is not something you can put as a bet. It’s something to do with your future, your health, your life. 

Also read: Reasons Why You Should Date a Virgin

You can always have a terrible first sex. It is all you need to ruin your life. Don’t be stupid.

10. Prepare Yourself For Someone Better

prepare yourself for someone better

Believe that better person will come along and now you’re currently waiting for him. If you consider virginity as something precious, you wouldn’t mind to wait. Meeting someone good means you won’t have any disappointing first sex. Be prepared and better focus to something else. Don’t let your desire to lose your virginity disturbing your daily life.

11. Don’t Mind About Your Age

What is the source of embarrassment that you’re still virgin? Maybe because you’re old enough to have it. But age is not a measurement for you to have sex. Being older doesn’t always make you wiser.

When you when to lose your virginity and still have the “What if I want to lose my virginity but I don’t have a boyfriend?” in your mind, you should reflect to yourself. Don’t rush to give it to another random boy just because you want it.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.
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