In all honesty, it shows how lacking in common decency and character the person is. If you have a break-up like that which in this case, you had been intimate with your ex-partner, in one instance, you realized in retrospect why they broke the relationship off and even so, they did it in a particularly cowardly and sleazy way.
All of a sudden, they just stopped contacting you and when you were shameless enough to try to reach out to them, they avoided you. The strange twist to the situation is, they eventually called you again only to treat you to the most unbelievably trivial details of their life since last you both talked, but then shocked you by asking for a break-up.
It is despicable to break up with someone without the courtesy of a conversation about it even if only very brief. This is especially true if you have had a few dates and even more so if there was intimacy. It is just sleazy not to talk things out face to face.
Anyone who has been treated so shabbily in a break-up will not likely appreciate what I am about to say, but still; you are way, way better off with that kind of boorish person out of your life. If this is how they handle a break-up, then imagine how awful it would be to go through something really difficult with them.
They obviously do not have the character and integrity to do the right things in life, especially in things that really test a person’s mettle and require real courage and common decency.
It may be hard to see it in the middle of getting badly hurt, but in time, you as the ill-treated party will probably be glad someday things did not pan out. After all, who needs skulking little weasels in their life?
Social Etiquette Standard
As the generation that gets along well with social media, internet, and mobile devices, communicating through technology comes naturally to most of us. Even our phones seem like an extension of ourselves in today’s era.
However, it is generally frowned upon to break off a relationship through text message or even phone call. It is all because it feels very insincere and impersonal and can leave the dumped partner feeling uncared for or disrespected.
Moreover, it is relatively easy to misinterpret text messages because you are missing non-verbal communication. Consequently, it is more difficult to accept a break-up this way. It will likely to leave you with many unanswered questions. Experts call it the dreaded limbo which means a place that makes finding a logical explanation and moving on extremely difficult.
When it comes to doing things that are less pleasant, some people may choose to be avoidant because hurting someone’s feelings is equal to having the worst nightmare. However, when it comes to breaking up with someone, you have to resist that selfish urge.
It is much more respectful and mature to sit down together and have a caring, kind, and compassionate discussion. Make sure the location where you and your partner have the conversation is chosen with your safety foremost in your mind.
For example, if you are worried about your safety or if your partner has difficulty managing their anger, breaking up in a public place would likely be the right choice. If the breakup is one of a mutual nature or if you feel your partner has stronger feelings for you but they are emotionally stable and can engage rationally, a face-to-face conversation conducted in a quiet place would be favorable.
When you are the one on the receiving end, being dumped not by face-to-face conversation feels really awful. Not only that, but it is also confusing, especially when the relationship seemed fine. They may think it is easier and less confrontational to break up through any means other than meet in person.
Generally speaking, almost all people dislike confrontation of any sort. Perhaps they have been dating you for a few weeks or months, and they are afraid of the drama that might come along in an in-person break-up; hence the break-up text message or the break-up phone call.
It really is an easy way. They may also think no one gets hurt, except that someone does get hurt and it is you, the person on the receiving end. In conclusion, a disrespectful break-up can have a lasting effect on someone’s self-esteem, meanwhile, a compassionate break-up is better for both parties’ sake.
So, have you ever been dumped by text message? Or, have you ever been dumped by a phone call? Feel free to share your thoughts below.