What to Say When Your Boyfriend Thinks He isn't Good Enough for You

Last updated on June 9, 2024 by Michelle Devani

Do you know how hurt it feels to hear someone we love having an extremely low self esteem about themselves? Like, they don’t feel they’re good enough for us while we are always thankful for his presence in our life. Well, that happens pretty often.

You must be at loss of words on what to say when your boyfriend thinks he isn’t good enough for you. You can assure him that it’s not true and you need to sound sincere while saying it. Because people with low self esteem are hard to convince. So here are some things that you can tell him.

  1. “I love you unconditionally.”

Yes, unconditional love means you won’t mind with all that he is. But doesn’t also mean that he is not good. In fact, he is so good that you decide to unconditionally love him.

He has to know that no matter what you will always love him, so he better chin up and have some confidence. Also read signs he's boyfriend material.

  1. “No one is to decide whether you’re good or not.”

Except you, no one is ever to decide it. You are the one in a relationship with him, so only you know whether he’s good for you or not. In case someone in against your relationship, you may tell him this. That person won’t do nothing with you.

  1. “Let’s give it a try and we’ll know.”

You will never know if you never try. This is the message you’re trying to deliver to him. As the time goes by, you’ll find out if he’s good for you. And while you are together, he can learn to be a good lover to you. So if you were imperfect before, you can become better. Also read signs that a man loves you unconditionally.

  1. “You’re not perfect, but so am I.”

This is what to say when your boyfriend thinks he isn’t good enough: tell him that in fact, he is not perfect. It must be the biggest reason why his self esteem is low. But so are you. You’re not perfect either, and just like how you cope with his imperfections he can do the same things to you too.

  1. “We are together to complete each other.”

So why were you decide to be together again? Yes, because you need each other and you complete each other. He covers your imperfections and so do you to him. That’s why two people decide to be together, because they have found the lost piece. Also read Characteristic of A Healthy and An Unhealthy Relationship

  1. “You are enough.”

No matter how not good he is like he thinks, all you care about is having him is enough. You don’t need anyone better, anyone perfect, just him. Simply because he is one of a kind, and there will be no other him with all his imperfections.

  1. “I don’t know about everyone else, but for me you are the best.”

Everyone else is including him. So what if he thinks he’s not good for you? The most important thing is that he is the best for you. He should realize it too and start valuing himself even more. No need to feel so low and bad about his own self. Also read What to Say When Your Boyfriend Asks How Much You Love Him

  1. “There is no exact measurement of goodness.”

Really, what can decide good and not good? Which means his perception is groundless and not based on solid facts. Because you are unable to decide goodness’ level of someone, he shouldn’t think that he is worthless too.

  1. “I never expect much from you.”

It’s better to tell him that he don’t need to feel so burdensome that he thinks he is not good enough for you. You love him for who he is and he never expect anything.

Expectation only lead to disappointment and another disappointment. So by loving him without expecting anything, you feel comfortable too. Also read What Do You Do When Your Boyfriend Goes Quiet On You

  1. “I love you just the way you are.”

Maybe you can quote Bruno Mars’ Just The Way You Are while saying this. It may sounds cliché but it’s true. When you love someone just the way you are, means your feeling is unchanged. Even if the rest of the world see him black, he always appears white for you.

So those are all we’ve got about what to say when your boyfriend thinks he isn’t good enough. As a good lover, you should pump up his confidence so that he can lift his chin up and become proud to be your lover.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.
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