How to Tell Your Ex You Slept with His Best Friend - Reveal The Truth

Last updated on May 3, 2024 by Michelle Devani

Sometimes you make the mistake of sleeping with your ex’s best friend. It could have happened while you were dating your ex or after you broke up with him. Still the fact remains that you did sleep with his best friend. Now you want to talk to your ex about it but not really sure how.

How to Tell Your Ex You Slept with His Best Friend

These tips will help you figure out the best ways to speak with your ex about it:

1. Be Calm

How to tell your ex you slept with his best friend? The first thing that you need to remember when you tell your ex you slept with his best friend is to be calm. Though you may feel a bit nervous about telling your ex, it’s important to maintain your composure. Once you are able to calm yourself, you’ll feel braver as you’re about to talk to him. Staying calm can also help to set the right atmosphere when you meet your ex. In case he gets emotional or angry, you will be able to know how to act.

2. Do it Soon

Once you’re very certain that talking to your ex about it is what you want to do, make sure to do it soon. Don’t wait for too long as it might make the situation becomes worse. Your ex should know about this firsthand from you. It would hurt your ex to know it from someone else.

3. Plan the Things You Want to Say

Planning out the things you want to say might save you later on. After this, your ex may not want to see you ever again. So, make sure that you’ll be able to tell him the important things. Other than that, you can also prepare yourself from questions that he may ask. You’ll avoid getting tongue tied around your boyfriend which could make you feel nervous and uncomfortable.

4. Meet Your Ex in Person

It’s highly crucial that you talk about it with your ex in person. It would be cold and cruel to tell him through texts or phone call. Only go with that route if nothing else can be done to reach him. Try your very best to make him agree to meet you in person. It’s a very delicate thing that should be handled through a direct conversation. Is he not responding to you at all? These Reasons Why Your Ex Boyfriend is Ignoring You might explain the reasons behind that.

5. Pick the Right Place to Talk

You can talk with your ex either at his place or your place as long as you’re comfortable with that. However, you can also pick out a neutral place that the two of you can agree on.

Choose a place that won’t be too noisy or too quiet. Get a spot where the two of you are able to have a private talk without being judged by the people around you. That's how to tell your ex you slept with his best friend.   

6. Don’t Bring His Best Friend with You

When you tell your ex you slept with his best friend, don’t bring the best friend with you. It’s a big no. If he’s in the same room as your ex, big arguments or fights could arise. You would not want that to happen. Let yourself have a private talk with your ex. Then let him have his time to talk about it with his best friend without you around.

7. Avoid Causing a Scene

You can’t really have a control over this. Your ex may have a sudden rage once you tell him the truth. However, there are some things you can do in case he suddenly gets loud and causes a scene. You can tell him to calm down as there are people around or you can kindly ask him to talk with you in a civil manner.

8. Don’t Beat Around the Bush

Waste no time when you’re talking with your ex. Don’t beat around the bush about all the details. That will make your ex impatient and irritated. Get right to the point of the fact that you slept with his best friend. Being straightforward with it is the best way to go. It may hurt at first but the sooner he knows, the sooner he can process the whole thing. 

9. Tell Your Ex the Whole Truth

You shouldn’t even think about lying about anything to your ex at this point. Though it may save you from feeling guilty, it may make him feel worse. You might as well tell everything he needs to know and get it over with. Lying would not be a good idea especially if he eventually finds out the truth. While talking to your ex, you may pick up some Signs Your Ex Wants You Back but Won't Admit It.

10. Don’t Make Excuses

You may feel the urge to make excuses to save yourself but don’t do it. It will only make you look like a bad person. You may also give off the impression of the Signs a Cheating Ex Wants You Back.

Since you’ve already decided to tell your ex about sleeping with his best friend, you might as well fully own up to that fact. Don’t try to shift the blame on him either. That won’t change anything and it may make the situation worse.

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11. Allow Your Ex Some Space

Sleeping with your ex’s best friend is a huge bomb to drop. Allow your ex to have some space to process it all. Don’t dominate the conversation. Let your ex stay quiet or say the things that he wants to let his emotions out. He may have a lot to say if he's still in love with you. Here are the Ways to Tell if Your Ex Still Has Feelings for You.

12. Answer His Questions Truthfully

Another thing about telling your ex you slept with his best friend is to always be honest. If your ex has some questions for you, answer truthfully. Don’t be defensive about them, just state the fact. However, if the questions become too personal or insulting then you can choose to stop answering. Learn  How to Tell Your Ex to Stop Contacting You Again after Bad Break Up and never see him again.

There's no guarantee that this decision will be a pleasant experience. You can be a little empathetic to your ex if he seems hurt by the whole thing.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.
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