After No Contact, I Tried to Contact My Ex. She Texted Back Saying "Do Not Send Messages." What Can I Say Back If I Want Her Back?

Last updated on April 9, 2024 by Michelle Devani

Text messages are one of the most effective means in your arsenal when you are trying to win your ex-girlfriend back. However, it can also serve as a double edged sword; either you use them properly or you might end up losing your ex-girlfriend forever.

A text message contains the right amount of ambiguity. It can leave enough uncertainty for your ex-girlfriend to wonder what is going on with you and why you are reaching out to her after no contact period. This curiosity gives you an opportunity to make her attracted to you again, to build rapport and trust.

There is a catch in this by the way. You cannot just casually pour your need and desire to a text message, send it to your ex-girlfriend, and expect her to start feeling drawn to you. If you text her the wrong way, you will most likely turn her off and make her lose attraction, connection, and even trust.

In this article, I will help you get your ex-girlfriend back with the right text messages that can develop attraction, connection, and trust. I will teach you how to text your ex-girlfriend for the first time after no contact has officially ended, how to write a deep, meaningful text message, and how to move from text messages to a phone call or a date swiftly.


Figure Out What You Need to Say

It depends on how awful your breakup was and how many troubles you caused after the breakup. If you appeared very needy and desperate after the breakup, you should check out the article on how to not look needy and desperate after the breakup.

Question yourself: Why are you texting your ex-girlfriend? Why do you want her back? Why do you think it is a good idea to pick up where you left? What has changed since the breakup and no contact period that will make your potential new relationship different?

Remember that you are allowed to contact your ex-girlfriend only if you want her back. If you are texting her to get closure, you are wasting your time. Chance is the answer to your question will only give rise to a new question.

You Cannot Act Casual Just Yet

If the last thing your ex-girlfriend said to you was “Do not send messages,” or something along that line, then you cannot just act casual with her as if the breakup had never happened. If you do that, she will be weird out and think you are out of your mind.

In this case, you need to clean the slate first so you can start again. I suggest you apologize for whatever happened during or after the breakup, tell her that you acknowledge that you have accepted the breakup, and tell her you have changed ever since.

After you apologize and explain it to your ex-girlfriend, you need to lay back for at least several days before you can send another text.

Samples of the Text

Here is a collection of texts you can send to your ex-girlfriend after no contact period ends.

  • I have been reflecting on all that has happened. I am ashamed for my bad behavior in the past and totally understand why it did not make any sense for you at the time. However, I have been working on bettering myself during our no contact period and determined to overcome it. I hope we can get back to the laughter.
  • I respect your decision to push me away. I do not know how you feel about me and I totally understand if you do not want to tell me, though I would really appreciate it if you would. It is hard to forget about the time spent together. I hope you are doing well and wish you all the best.
  • Hey, I just stopped by the café we would often have dates and it immediately made me think of you. How are you doing? Have you found out another cool café? If you have, I hope you would not mind sharing with me.
  • Hey, I hope all is well. I am just wondering if you remember the address of that really dope CD shop downtown. I want to take my friend there for some window shopping. You can join us if you want to.
  • I just finished doing Harry Potter marathon and Luna Lovegood reminded me of how quirky you are sometimes. She really did resemble you in so many ways. How are you by the way? Is everything okay?
  • I just want to let you know that I am at the grocery store downtown and that brand new snack you wanted to buy but got no luck to do so is on sale. Grab it fast before it runs out of stock. Anyway, I hope you are doing okay.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.
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