My Boyfriend Doesn't Text Me First. I Have to Text Him First, and After That He Often Doesn't Text Me Back. Why?

Last updated on June 8, 2024 by Michelle Devani

Texting in a relationship could require a book on its own. There are just so many aspects of it that many of us would like to analyze, such as how to tell a guy like us looking at his text messages or why an ex is texting after 6 months.

Sometimes, it's just as simple as the fact that he never texts you first. When you take an initiative to text him, he often doesn't text back in return. Why does he do this? What should you do? Here are some tips for you.

1. Understand that some guys are a lame texter.

Us girls are can be called a specialist when it comes to texting. We know how to make interesting conversation out of texts. We gossip with our girlfriends and have a group chat.

We encourage our friends via text messages. The same thing doesn't apply to some guys. Sometimes they don't know what words they should type with their phone keyboard.

They don't know what emoji to use. They don't know that a simple "ok" can be interpreted as being angry. They don't know that some girls like to over analyze their boyfriend text.

Tips: Just understand him and not put too much emphasize on texting. There are still many other forms of communication. There are ways to keep in touch beside texting.

2. Have a call instead

If your boyfriend takes too much time to reply and you are dying to tell him something important, have a phone call instead. With a phone call, your message will be delivered much more clearly to the recipient. He even prefers it if he's too lazy or too busy to type. A call is more efficient.

3. Do not text too much and too long

Some people have a habit of texting too much and too long. Text messages are meant to be simple. You ought not to write essays on your phone. Learn to make your point in a compact way. If your boyfriend sees ten subsequent text messages from you, he would get overwhelmed and doesn't know which message to reply first.

Tips: keep it simple with your text messages.

4. He is busy

Sometimes, he just has a lot of things to do. Be it school assignments or work matters, he needs to concentrate on other matters. Remember that he is an individual with a life and you are not his only concern. Put yourself in his shoes, if you're busy with important matters, you really don't want anyone bothering you.

5. You are too bored

You might need to get a look at yourself. Why is exactly you texting him? Is it truly important? Do you miss him? Think about another possibility, maybe you are just bored. You got nothing to do, and you want attention. hence you bombard your poor boyfriend with so many text messages.

Tips: Get a hobby, read a book, spend your time with meaningful activities that improve your knowledge or your skill. Never waste time.

6. Talk to this issue when you meet

If it bothers you so much, you can simply talk about it to your boyfriend. Do not discuss it by text or a phone call though, make it your agenda next time you guys having a date.

Discuss calmly and if this whole texting thing upset you, don't let it make you too emotional. Have a grown-up talk, discuss solutions, and don't blame anyone.

7. Ask him to text you first

Sometimes a guy is so clueless you simply need to tell him what to do. He could not know it that him texting you is something you consider important.

Ask him straightforwardly. Tell him if he's not busy, text back immediately. Ask him to text you every morning, or whichever schedule works for you. If he really cares for you, he will comply with your request.

8. He needs alone time

Perhaps you are in a relationship when you both meet a lot. Maybe you both go to the same school or work in the same company. Maybe you live together.

Wondering about your man? Let's find out who he really is.
From the newly dating to the happily married, trust issues can creep up on anyone. With cheating cases soaring over 40% in the last two decades, it's natural to have your doubts.

Could he be sending flirty texts to another woman? Or secretly swiping on Tinder? Or even have a hidden criminal past? Or, the worst fear - could he be cheating?

This useful tool can bring the truth to light. It'll dig out hidden social media accounts, dating profiles, photos, any legal run-ins, and more. Let us help clear your mind.

Most of the time, you spend time together. he would need to get away from you for a while. Let him be, because that why he will miss you and can't wait to get back to you.

If he totally disappears, you might want to read his reasons why he stopped contacting you.

9. He saves his silence for when you meet

He has so much to talk about and a text is not enough. So he keeps silent until the next time you actually meet. This kind of guy can be interesting because they're so enthusiastic.

Tips: Do not bother yourself over him not texting, because you know it's not about you and by the end of the day, he will surprise you with the attention you need.

10. He Doesn't Love You

Tips: Back off. move on. Screw him.

Utilize this instrument for a comprehensive background check
Whether your relationship is in its budding phase or you're in the blissful realm of marriage, escalating infidelity rates (over 40% in the past two decades) warrant your caution.

You may want to ascertain whether he is engaging in secretive text conversations with other women, maintaining active profiles on dating platforms like Tinder, or concealing a criminal history. Or you might be fearing the worst - infidelity.

This robust tool is designed to uncover hidden social media and dating profiles, unseen photographs, undisclosed criminal records, and much more, providing you with the clarity you need.

Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.
LoveDevani is an independent website. We provide resources that help you in your relationship, marriage, and dating life.
117 Westgate Dr
Lexington, KY 40504, USA
+1 (859) 901-8018

This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.

Copyright © 2017 - 2022 by