How To Tease A Girl On Text (35 Vital Tips)

Last updated on May 14, 2024 by Michelle Devani

The advancement of technology has somehow still not solved the mystery attached to the art of texting women. This mystery gets stronger with time, even when everyone seems to own a cellphone.

If you've felt attracted to a girl or a couple of girls over the last few months, chances are you've been thinking of good examples to send as your first message or words that could help you build attraction while flirting effortlessly with the girl in question. 

We've done the homework for you in this article, where we provide you with scientifically proven tips and clear examples to give you control over your flirting life and to turn any girl on with ease.

From romance tips, to how best to use humor in your favor, these suggestions are ideal for any guy looking to break free from the friendzone, and those looking to score more than a date at the coffee shop.


35 Tips Or Ways To Tease A Girl

1. Teasing the escalation

Most often, we think of teasing, and we think negatively. An inside joe can be made to a girl without it having to make fun of her or her personality. In our context, we view teasing as texting girls a little bit of what they want, only to take it away when she begins to beg for more. 

There are so many ways to 'tease the escalation' via text such that she doesn't lose interest too quickly. One of such ways is by complimenting her, as you always do but adding a twist, finally making it a compliment about yourself. 

Another great way to escalate tension between you and a girl is by being cryptic. You don't have to overtly state your dirty thoughts to create sexual tension. Sometimes, you can present sexual innuendo in a subtle, hidden manner. For instance, you could talk about eating a pancake in a manner that describes you eating her out. 

2. Be romantic

One way all nice guys can sweep a woman off her feet via his text game is by being romantic. Girls love romance, and everyone knows it. Instead of reinventing the wheel with attractive women, flip the romance script for a second. What do we mean? 

You can create sexual tension by telling her you do need to be romanced. Putting your needs out there breaks the usual stereotype, making her more aware of who she's texting. She's forced to come out of her stereotypical role, one she's become familiar with concerning all the other guys in her life. 

The result of being honestly romantic is that you're able to create sexual tension that transcends your first date and evokes an emotional reaction within the woman who can't wait to be with you. 

3. Use innuendos

An innuendo is a word or a phrase that can mean two different things. Using innuendoes in your text conversations, especially those meant to increase sexual tension, means you choose words or phrases ambiguous enough that you can get away with them, as though you're not trying to come on to her. 

Innuendos in text messages are easy to deny or playfully worm your way out. If she happens to accuse you of having a dirty mind, you can turn the text conversation around, accusing her of having a dirty mind. 

4. Don't be predictable

They might deny it, but girls love it when you are flirtatious and when they're interested in you. There are different ways to flirt, with some being more perverse than others. As much as possible, strive not to be a boring texter. This is a major turn-off for girls, and it has left many people with nothing more than a first date. 

Shun is away from boredom and predictability by avoiding text messages such as 'hey' and 'how are you doing? These phrases repel any sexual tension, add nothing to her view of you, and don't make her feel like being friends anymore. Imagine being kicked out of the friend zone because you couldn't keep a conversation.

5. Don't be needy

Imagine flirting with or teasing an attractive woman, missing out on her messages for a couple of days only to come back to messages such as 'hey, you don't text me as often as I text you;' Sounds clingy, right? Well, imagine if the tables were turned and you were the one sending that message. 

The easiest way to curb sexual tension in women is by sounding needy. You can be the most attractive man, but once you start getting needy to a girl over text, she's most likely to avoid you altogether. Women love to engage with men who have their life together, not someone they have to save or fix with their presence. 

The key to preventing yourself from being needy is to realize that the woman you're teasing or flirting with is engaging in similar conversations with others. Plus, she has her own life and probably works to focus on. Thus, she will not always be available to enjoy text conversations.

6. Use the push or pull

The push and pull term means exactly what it says. Pushing a girl over text means passing comments and sending messages that suggest you're not interested in her to a girl. Pulling is when you send messages that trigger a feeling of attraction and love in the other person. 

The good thing about text is that you can employ both the push and pull systems to make flirting or teasing effortless. 

When you pull most of the time and inject a few pushes occasionally, you create tension, increasing the attraction level between you and the girl you're looking to score dates with. The push and pull are great because it sets you apart from all the other guys who constantly shower her with compliments or show her how much they like her. 

7. Build anticipation

You might have connected via an online dating website and hit it off immediately. You've never met this girl, but you're looking forward to your first date and hoping to build the right kind of anticipation through your text messages. Yes, it is possible!

The key to building anticipation through text messages is stimulating her senses with descriptive phrases and words. Let's say your first date will be at a coffee place in the afternoon. The text message you send on the morning of your date can look something like this;

"I can't wait to get coffee with you later today." The creamy mochas at this cafe are the best, not to mention their delicious aroma!

Though simple at sight, this message stimulates her senses, acting as a pre-arousal message that will leave her impatient to finally meet up with you. 

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8. Use flirty nicknames

use flirty nicknames

Another way to turn your basic text messages into teasing or flirting elements is by creating and using suggestive nicknames. When you text girls, you need to offer playful and suggestive nicknames that instantly make her aware you are here for fun but not friendship. 

Typical examples of flirty nicknames include peach bum, sugar tits, sweet cheeks, sexy pants and many more. Flirting with a girl over text using such sultry nicknames will make your conversations more fun while building the sexual tension you're looking for. 

9. Pictures, memes and gifs

We're all bombarded with so many visuals daily that sometimes text messages come hard to us. There's a way to make teasing a girl over text more effortless if you're not the words type; use visuals. 

You could try so many magical visuals, from simple yet sultry memes to story-telling pictures and GiFs. Simply search for sexy memes online, and you'll be provided with an endless list of options you can say more with than if you tried using words. 

10. Be playful

Nothing beats sexual tension presented in a way that women can have fun with. Introduce sexual tension to raise attraction levels in any girl by employing the 'let's do it' text message mode. 

This is a simple mode where you tease a girl as though she already can't help but think about going to bed with you. Here, you playfully present your teasing, which opens the door for her to play along. A simple example can look like this;

Her: "Are you free over the weekend?"

Your response: "Let's do it…hang out i man… not sex."

Your response is making fun of her question but, at the same time, teasing her for a flirty reaction. The let's do it technique is easy to escalate your flirty text conversation, making it more fun. 

11. Get her to open up sexually

Teasing a girl on text can sometimes be dicey, especially when dealing with a girl who is uncomfortable with getting sexual virtually. Such ladies might hate it only when they don't know the other person well. Thus, you must create an environment where she's comfortable enough during the conversation to know that however she responds, she will not get judged. 

While you have fun, be sure to let her know that wherever tease or sexual conversation you have won't be told to others. This might set you apart from other guys she's been in contact with, increasing her trust and, in turn, making the rest of your conversation open, honest and, most importantly, fun. 

12. Welcome all her fantasies

Another way you can turn a girl on is by welcoming all her fantasies, even if you don't agree with them. If she's sexually insecure and stops texting, accept that part of her. If she loves the conversation and is into wild freaky stuff, welcome that.

The best way to show a girl she can trust you with her fantasies is to share yours first. Take the first step and talk about what you like, how you like to tease and how you want to be teased. Talk about how you imagine your date going, the kinds of things that make you laugh and even things you find boring. She'll be more comfortable sharing her sexual interests with you after that.

13. Use vivid descriptions

If you're not a fan of visuals like the photos and memes mentioned earlier, this might be your forte: being descriptive with your choice of words. You don't want to be the boring guy who sends messages she can share with friends and laugh about. 

To stand out, ditch the typical 'i want to kiss you' messages and tease her with vivid, sensual images she can linger on. You can tease her mind by telling her how much you want to lift her onto your kitchen counter, slide your hands between her thighs and tug on her back as you kiss her after your date.

14. The dirty dream method

Sometimes, all you need to do is dive right in with your tease while texting, and the dirty dream technique is easy. With this technique, you must be careful, considering where you both are on the connection spectrum. 

If you have a strong connection, you can tell her how you had one of the dirtiest dreams about her the night before. Chances are she'll be dying to know what happened! Your next step must be strategic. Infuse the best description and, if possible, end with innuendo that'll leave her both amused and flustered. 

If you don't have a strong connection yet, it is better to bring up your 'dirty dream' more casually, as though you're shocked it happened. Her curiosity might get the best of her, and she might forget you're not that close for a second. 

15. Don't lose your cool

Sometimes, what we think is flirty is considered perverted by the person we are communicating with. In such instances, you don't have to lose your cool. Never forget that she's human; as such, it's normal to get offended by certain statements every once in a while. 

When your text offends the girl at any point, you must acknowledge that she's offended, validating her feelings and showing her you understand. Avoid making fun of her for feeling offended, as it can end your texting streak and affect any potential relationships you might have. A typical example is below;

Her: "That's a very offensive thing to say and honestly i'm really digested."

Your response: "My bad, it was never my intention to offend you. I was just thinking about how sexy you are and how badly I was thinking about making you moan."

16. Start slow

start slow

You might have to start slow with your flirting with shy ladies. Shy girls are different because you can't move directly from talking about the weather to making love in the rain. She might miss your humor cues or avoid texting you altogether. The key is to start slow.

Be gradual in the process, starting with what you appreciate the most about her. Compliment her personality and tell her about some of the things you like about her. But please, be truthful. 

You can also turn her words around ever so slightly, using them to tease her about how much she wants to kiss you. 

Her: "OMG you look so cute in your last photo! Your cheeks look so pinch-worthy."

Your response: "Aww, I love when you talk dirty to me!"

If she finds your response offensive, take a step back. Focus on the end goal of taking her out and use that as motivation to work around any texting issues encountered. 

17. Escalate things

While you might choose to take it too slow with shy girls, there are those you might love to speed up things with; those who share the same vision as you! To take things into stealth mode via texting, all you need to do is tell her how badly you can't stop thinking about her. Tease her about how difficult it's going to be to keep your hands to yourself when you meet her. 

Once he's on board, you can take it a notch higher, being even more descriptive about her body, and offering sweet compliments. Texting is an easy way to play with sexual tension, and it is a great form of foreplay building up to the real thing, so pull out the big guns!

18. Pose a challenge

Another way to tease her is by texting her a challenge. You can start by telling her she'll never be able to beat you at a specific challenge. It can be anything from playing ping pong to dancing non-stop. 

An easy way to know if she's bought into your tease is when she starts to argue with you, telling you that you cannot be better than her at that challenge. To take it an extra mile, test the theory on your next date and whoever loses has to do something exciting, such as being at the beck and call of the winner for a full day. 

While this might sound like a simple tease, it goes a long way to build sexual tension between you through your strong, macho act of posing a challenge. 

19. Disagree with her

When we disagree, we don't mean arguing a point; that only takes away the humour and gets her to walk the other way. Disagreeing with something she says should be done light and fun. Girls, by nature, aren't attracted to a guy who agrees with everything they say; thus, disagreeing with her occasionally is a great step to take. 

Let her know you're a man with your views and opinions while teasing her with your statements to get a reaction. If she's into Korean drama, for example, you can disagree that they're the best thing in the world by saying something like, "No way can you be this boring. There are so many better things out there." In calling her lame, you're teasing a reaction out of her, and by disagreeing, you're evoking curiosity.

20. Mimic her

Not every tease needs to be sexual. Sometimes, a tease can be in the form of mimicry. Mimicking what a girl is saying is a simple albeit cute way to tease a girl and have a great conversation via text with her. If she sends a message, you could mimic it by sending her a voice note of the same sentence in a high-pitched tone. 

This is a huge turn-on for many women as they love the audacity you have to joke like that with her. Also, it's a funny act that will make her laugh for a long time, which is great for your conversations and dates. 

21. Accuse her of hitting on you

One way to plant the idea of being hit on in a girl's head is by accusing her of hitting on you. This is a tactic used by several people over the years, yielding some of the best memorable responses. In teasing her this way, you've planted the idea of being hit on in her mind and left her more interested in you than before. 

These simple text messages are enough to turn a girl on and keep her impressed by your guts and wits to jokingly insinuate something like that about her. It can be as simple as this question; 'Are you trying to hit on me right now?'

22. Treat her like a child

If there's one thing most women love but won't readily own up to openly, it's being treated like a little child by her man. They'll never admit it, but it's an act they find extremely sexy, getting them into the right mood and creating the right kind of sexual tension. 

Try using terms such as little one or young lady to create the little girl or childlike effect. If you're bold enough and have stronger connections, you can take it up a notch, saying things like 'i think this little girl needs a little spanking'. This is sure to excite her and make your conversations even more exciting. 

23. Say you can't be friends anymore

If you find out she likes a movie you absolutely cannot stand, you can use the situation to tease her by telling her you can't be friends anymore. The message can be simple, starting with something like 'I can't believe you enjoy watching that'. By following up with 'we totally can't be friends anymore, you're working to keep the spark between you two alive while making things more interesting and fun. 

24. Use stereotypes

use stereotypes

Stereotyping can be used in a teasing, sensual manner when texting a girl. You can stereotype them according to where she's from or their profession. For example, if she's an accountant, you can say something like, 'oops, I should be careful about what I say about money around you, you cute accountant'. 

When stereotyping is done right, it opens the door to flirting, which allows her to flirt right back with you. 

25. Be mysterious

Bringing in a little or a lot of mystery in your text messages poses no harm. It is a great way to tease a girl over text. The idea of mystery is to make her feel like she's chasing you, not the other way around. In offering mystery, try being aloof or a little vague at times, but not too much. Too much mystery, and she might think of you as a murderer or something sinister and suspicious. 

A typical example of being mysterious is in how you answer her questions. If she asks how your day went, avoid the itch to chronicle every last tale into an essay read for her reading pleasure. Summarize your day into an intriguing sentence: "It was rather weird. I'll never understand how people think." Such an answer has more than enough mystery to leave her wanting more in your other messages. 

26. Short and sweet is the way

Long messages are not the best option when trying to flirt. As much as possible, keep your messages short and sweet, and watch them work their magic. As a rule of thumb, don't surpass two or three sentences simultaneously. Else, you'll seem overeager and might become a turn-off. 

When flirting, avoid making short messages about things like the weather. Try to make them sweet, clever, and even funny, as these are easier to remember and ponder. 

27. Ensure equality

Equality in this context has to do with the number of texts both sent. In every texting relationship, there has to be some amount of equality, meaning that one person shouldn't be sending more messages than the other. 

Sending more messages than she doesn't make you seem too available and over eager. It might seem like you're coming on too strong, which might cause her to lose her attraction toward you—sending less than she might be interpreted as you are disinterested and have many others quaint in line. This might also cause her to give up on you, labelling you a lost cause. 

Strive to attain an equal number of messages, if possible, having her send more than you. Also, work at alternating whose initiation and ending each conversation to keep things more balanced. 

28. Use impeccable grammar

The worst thing you can do while flirting over the phone is to use shorthand or send messages with countless grammatical errors. Txtin lyk dis is a sure turn-off for women, as it doesn't present you as an intelligent and witty person. 

Once you're past 18, paying attention to your spelling and grammar is crucial, as these determine whether or not you get more than a first date. Scan every message for errors before sending it out, and pay attention to your use of punctuations, as they alter the interpretation of what seems like a simple statement. 

29. Create a game

Another spectacular way to tease a girl is by using the game tactically. Invite her to play a cute question-and-answer game, where you're both meant to guess each other's answers. It could range from five to ten questions, but ensure that these questions offer you great chances of sneaking in a tease now and then. 

A typical example could be when the question "What's your favorite hobby?" is asked. You could offer an answer like, 'being in bed beside me to get a reaction from her. She'll most likely flirt or tease back if she's on the same page. 

30. Tease her for being too keen

It is true that you ideally want a girl to be keener than you are to ensure she's invested in the conversation. However, this can be used to your advantage when sending text messages. If she's the type who replies quickly to your messages, or texts a couple of times in a row, you can tease her about it.

This is an intentional act meant to make her aware that you're on to her, and you've taken note because of your increased interest in her. She'll get the message that you know about her feelings for you, and you're teasing her about it. 

31. Get extra flirty

You might have already gone on your first or second date, which was a lot of fun for the both of you. Now's your time to use that opportunity to tease her about liking you. This is an easy way to start the flirting process and ultimately build sexual tension. 

Right after you've said your goodbyes, you can send her a text saying, 'why am I still on your mind? Teasing her about the date or her feelings for you is bent on making her want you more. If she happens to be on the same wavelength, she'll come up with an equally playful reply. 

32. Get cute

get cute

Are you looking to offer compliments without sounding excessively cheesy? You can simultaneously sound like the charmer you are by being playful and sweet. This allows you to relay your feelings without sounding too complementary or intense. 

A message you can send that doesn't make you sound too keen can be 'I just saw the cutest butterfly in my garden, and it reminded me of your colorful smile. 

33. Be a generous mix

If there's one thing you should avoid, it is always using one strategy. It can get very obvious or boring with time. As much as possible, strive to mix and match things up now and then. 

You can play with different methods of teasing, from using her humor against her to mocking her, sharing memes and photos, or even voice notes. Mixing it up adds a sense of mystery to your conversations because she never fully knows what to expect from you. 

34. Make fun of her meanness

In certain instances, a tease might rub off on a girl in the wrong way, and it can make your conversation awkward. To recover quickly from such a scenario, you can find her attempts at being mean to you hilarious. If she, for instance, ignores your subsequent messages for a while, you can let her know you are amused by saying, 'I think it's cute when you ignore me…is someone trying to make a point?'. 

This does not only reduce the tension, but it also lets her know you're available to listen to what offended her. This strengthens your connection and saves your overall conversation.

35. Be persistent

Persist in winning her back after utilizing your humor. To win her back, consider sending cute pictures or memes with messages such as 'still angry?'. The photos should make her laugh and feel humored enough to give you another chance at engaging. 


How can I playfully tease through text?

When flirting with a girl, you most likely want to be flirtatious but not outrightly so, and this is the best way to go, as to build sexual tension and leave the young lady in more need of your company. One of the easy ways to achieve this is via text teasing. 

Text teasing allows you to flirt as much as you want but still play it off so that things don't move faster than they have to. Work your feelings into every text conversation as naturally as possible, sticking to text messages that feel natural to you. If you're shy in person, you can opt for a more subtle approach, with an inside joke here and there. 

How do you tease a girl over the phone?

Teasing on the phone comes with a lot of extra work, mainly because you're losing the physical element of speaking face to face, reading their facial cues, and knowing what turns them on or not. Your best when flirting through text or call is by using humor. Keep your text messages light and funny, making jokes or funnily retelling your stories. 

However, it is vital to note that not everything you say needs to be funny. All other guys might be trying too hard to make everything they say or text funny, so it's up to you to be the difference. Know when to be serious and make her laugh; with this, she might never lose interest. 

What words make a girl feel special?

You might be deeply in love with this girl you're talking with, but you shall never truly know how you feel until she hears it in words she can appreciate. Women love words; much more than men; thus, it's vital to let her know how loved and appreciated she is at all times. 

Words can do a lot, from creating sexual tension to making women lose interest in you. If you want to make a woman feel special, consider using lots of cute descriptive words. Say cute things such as 'you'll always be my girl, 'i can't stop thinking about you, and 'i love making you laugh. You can also make a playful statement to catch an emotional reaction; chances are, when done right, you will get an amazing reaction. 

What's a good flirty text?

There's nothing better than a good flirty text message waking you up in the morning. To achieve your aim of creating tension between you and this special person, your text game must be strong, and every word on point. Make things interesting by keeping your messages more personal. Some examples include:

"You'll never guess what you were doing in my dream last night."

"I'm missing you already, and you just left!"

Once you initiate contact, go to town with your texts. Convey any dirty thoughts you've had brewing into text and coat them with a little humour to ensure shoes are texting right back. 

How can you make a girl jealous?

Sometimes, your girlfriend might seem preoccupied with other things to give you attention, which can take a major toll on the relationship. Your relationship might have suddenly become boring, and you're looking for ways to spice things up; to get your partner even more interested. 

One thing you can try as a trigger to drive the relationship is to get her jealous. Making girls feel jealous is relatively easy to do once they are already interested in you. You can make your girlfriend jealous by complimenting other women or talking about their behaviour or looks. You can also consider talking to other women in her presence. 

Be careful, however, not to spend the whole day doing this, as your aim of evoking jealousy might backfire, leaving you with a partner who is no longer interested. 

In Conclusion

Relationships or working towards a relationship can be tricky; one wrong move and the interest created can be lost forever. The same applies to teasing a girl. You're bound to get friend-zoned if you don't tease her and if you tease a girl over text, but in the wrong way, she'll lose interest and think of you as an asshole for life. 

Using these scientifically proven ways to tease is a sure way to know why and how to tease. The practical examples are great for most men to emulate, to achieve great conversation with girls and build attraction.

We hope you enjoyed this article. If you do, share it with your next date, friends or family across all platforms, and share stories in the comment section if you have any. 

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.

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