Reading The Signs A Shy Guy Loves You (29 Signs You May Be Missing)

Last updated on July 12, 2024 by Michelle Devani

Is there a shy guy in your life that you would love to get to know better?

Are you wondering how he feels about you?

You probably are, because shy guys aren’t exactly the greatest at showing how they feel about  someone. 

Nevertheless, there are a few subtle signs that shy guys tend to show when they are attracted to a woman - and I’ve listed them below.  

First, though, I want to start this article by revealing the best thing you can do to make these shy guys unable to resist you.

Your looks and personality are important, but not as important as how you make them feel. 

This took me years to learn, but it’s a lesson that changed my love life forever.

It all started when I learned about a deeply primal aspect of male psychology that few people seem to know about. 

It has been dubbed ‘The Hero’s Instinct’. If you can trigger this part of the male mind, he will begin to experience intense and overwhelming feelings of power and purpose. He’ll naturally become closer to any woman who can do this. 

I know because I learned how to do it! 

Before this, I was perceived as the nice girl who was only good for ‘a bit of fun’. But this skill taught me how to be taken seriously as a long-term companion.

It is the #1 skill for attracting and keeping high-quality men into your life. To learn how I did it, click to read my personal story.  

Of course, it may be that this specific shy guy may already be head over heels in love with you. Read on to discover the signs that this is the case.


29 Signs A Shy Guy Likes You

You have to admit that shy guys have a level of mystery to them that just draws you in. Have you perhaps found your mysterious special one or seen potential in a guy, but the reserved territory is a little out of your scope?

You may have noticed that knowing a little something about how it feels when (other) guys fall for you doesn’t mean you can tell if a shy guy likes you. 

Does he act weird around you because he likes you or can’t stand you? What is even weird for him?

One way to know if a man likes you is through his words backed up by his actions. While it follows that shy ones are like this in some ways, being outspoken about their feelings for you right away is a lot out of character for them.

How then do you know whether to hang around, make a move, or throw your hands up and accept he’s not interested? If you want to know how to tell if a shy guy is into you, here are some useful signs that should help.

29 signs a shy guy likes you

1. He gets super nervous around you

Shy people are not popular for their social skills as they generally tend to be timid around people. Signs that a shy guy likes you don’t get any clearer than when he’s a little more fidgety around you than others. This may cause him to try (sometimes too hard) to hide behind jokes or a smile.

On the other hand, not trying at all can also be a result of nervousness. He just sits in a corner, passively observing everything going on without actually interacting with you. You’ve likely mistaken this as him ignoring you, but the reverse is probably the case.

2. You can feel his eyes on you when you’re not looking

Do you ever get the feeling he’s staring without actually ever meeting his eyes? You may have even caught his gaze once or twice. While you debate whether he likes you or not, he’s somewhere between risking it all to ask you out and waiting for the ‘right time.’ 

That right time, of course, is never early. He wants everything to be perfect when he finally says something, so he takes solace in stealing glances until an opportunity presents itself.

3. He hardly maintains eye contact

He may try to make eye contact with you when he’s leaving the room or when he comes in, but that’s about it. You may find him looking down or anywhere else but at you when you try to talk to him, and when your eyes meet, it’s brief.

Just like he fidgets when he gets nervous around you, he does all these to avoid having his eyes betray his feelings. However, he doesn’t know that his effort to conceal only makes his interests more obvious to the discerning eye.

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4. His face lights up when he sees you

his face lights up when he sees you

Do you ever walk into a room and catch a little sparkle in his eyes when he spots you? When he doesn’t see you right away, and you notice him looking at your usual spot before his gaze finally settles on you, it’s the cutest thing.

Even though that doesn’t guarantee him coming over to talk to you, it’s a sign he notices when you’re not there and is happier when you are. You may also find him smiling from ear to ear for no reason.

5. He’s always around but at a distance

You may not realize this at first, but doesn’t it strike you a bit odd that he always gets his coffee around the same time you do? You don’t work or go to school together yet you see each other every other day.

This may be pure coincidence, but there’s also a good chance someone’s making an effort to be there. If you want to know if this shy man really likes you, then make sure you pay attention to his looming presence around your favorite spots.

6. He goes quiet when you enter

Most shy guys have their circle of friends with whom they get to be themselves without holding back. They talk more and are generally more expressive with those people, whether indoors or out in public. If you see a usually shy man being a chatterbox outside, he’s most likely with his group.

However, he could be cracking them up real hard or roaring with laughter then once you enter, it seems like he lost his voice. It’s not that the jokes are no longer funny to him, he’s just careful not to look silly because he likes you.

7. His friends act like they know something you don’t when you’re around

Shy guys tend to keep to themselves a lot, but many of them still confide in friends when they’re going through stuff. Chances are your shy man’s friends would know if he had feelings for you. So make sure you pay attention to how his friends treat you, you might just get your answer from them.

You may find them exchanging knowing glances when you are around, or they continue to bring their friend up while he blushingly shushes them. These are signs they know something you don’t, or at least aren’t sure of. 

8. His friends treat you with ‘extra respect’

Do you ever get a “my friend’s girlfriend” vibe from his buddies instead of a regular acquaintance? Perhaps one of them used to flirt with you but stopped and is now more polite than ever. The one that didn’t seem to like you a lot now acts civil, and some of them even try to peacock to make their clique look good.

They don’t have to be your fan as long as you’re important to their guy, you get some of the love and respect they have for him. That’s the beauty of friendship.

9. He’s freer when you chat or talk over the phone

The highest you ever get when you see each other at the coffee shop is a staring contest or a hello. However, over the phone, conversations between you really flow. It makes you wonder if you’re chatting with the same shy guy who won’t even look at you or make a move to talk to you in person.

The confidence that being behind a screen gives can be even more effective than the one he gets when his friends are around, you see. At this point, make sure you let him know you have noticed this phenomenon. 

10. He offers to help you often

he offers to help you often

A shy guy may not tell you straight up that he really likes you, but his actions can say plenty. Shy people tend to avoid confrontation and may take it to the point of being unable to say no when someone asks for their help.

But with you, it’s more than being courteous. You can tell if a shy guy really enjoys doing things for you. It’s an even better sign if he volunteers without being asked because that wouldn’t happen if he didn’t get some form of fulfillment from it.

11. He hangs on your every word

You may have heard that shy guys are great listeners when they are interested in you. If he gives you the impression that you can come to him whenever you need someone to talk to, that guy cherishes you.

When a shy guy really fancies you, he doesn’t tune you out no matter how boring or out of his range the conversation might be. And a lot of the time, he doesn’t forget. If this person has referred to or followed up on something you told a long time ago or didn’t expect him to remember, there’s your sign.

12. He puts himself more in your element

You may not be the most outgoing person in your group but still be way ahead of this guy in terms of being social. If he attends a party you invited him to and actually spends time with you there instead of on his phone, then that might be a sign this shy guy likes you.

Leaving your comfort zone is never fun, but if he doesn’t mind doing it anyway for your sake, you’re definitely in. Trying new things may be fun and natural for you, but it isn’t short of a sacrifice when a shy person really puts themselves out there like that.

13. He’s curious about you

Shy really people process things deeply, and it shows in the way they think. They may not say much but have probably run several scenarios of you meeting and talking, so it’s safe to say they’re always prepared for a conversation.

Therefore, when he gets the chance, he asks a lot of questions. Sometimes even singling you out among others. This is all in a bid to really get to know you down to what makes you tick. What do you think makes guys do that if not love?

14. He follows you on social media

One way or the other, social media has a way of bringing people together. If you two barely say ‘hi’ to each other in real life, but you get a follow from him online, it might be his way of breaking the ice. 

If you are only just starting out he may interact with a lot of your posts to get your attention or admire your profile from afar if he isn’t feeling so bold. It may not mean he wants you to have his kids yet, but linking up online is indicative of his interest in getting to know you better, at the very least.

15. He tries to impress you

he tries to impress you

Because shy men are such good listeners, they get to pick details you share in passing and those you didn’t even know you were sharing. You may forget having mentioned being partial to ‘fit guys’ or those who dress a certain way, but he probably won't if he was there.

This gives him an advantage over men who try to impress every woman they meet with the same moves. He probably likes you if he started working out or dressing better after he heard what you said.

16. He behaves differently around you compared to other women

Sometimes all you need to know if a shy guy likes you is to compare his treatment of you to other ladies. Maybe he doesn’t get nervous when he talks to you but is like that with every other girl. Or he likes to stare a lot at pretty people.

Try this theory out next time he hangs with you and your female friends in a random place like a restaurant. If it turns out he’s just another regular guy around them but turns to jelly around you, that’s a good sign.

17. His body language is all over the place around you

With someone who doesn’t talk much, it may be hard to differentiate between being quiet due to social anxiety or doing so just for the sake of it. And that brings me to this point because who needs to talk when his body is full of clues?

Does he blush or stutter when he attempts to talk to you without looking in your eyes? Or cross his arms and can’t seem to keep them still when you’re around? If he isn’t like that with other women, he most likely really likes you.

18. He agrees with you a lot

More often than not, when you like someone, being in harmony with them means more to you than being right. This may not sound like a standout point for reserved people since they usually don’t rush toward confrontation, but it can be a credible sign he likes you.

Does he try his best not to oppose you so much that you know you have to be utterly wrong if he doesn’t side with you in an argument? Beyond the need to be on the same page, this attribute is also driven by the fact that shy people know what it’s like to feel bad.

19. He squirms when you give him a compliment

Though everyone likes to be appreciated, quiet people can act a little awkward when someone they like pays them a compliment. Instead of the customary ‘thanks,’ you may get a mumble, stutter, or blush from him if you tell him you like his shirt.

You might even notice him looking visibly uncomfortable if what you say catches him off guard. Awkwardness notwithstanding, these are all better signs than if he takes your compliment with a straight face or doesn’t seem fazed at all by it.

20. He is comfortable being friends

From experience, I can tell you that shy men aren’t usually as keen on rushing things as their more outgoing counterparts. Mostly because they’re still struggling to broach the subject, as fear of rejection brings their insecurities to the surface.

That you’ve known each other a while and have even graduated to talking over the phone often, yet refuses to ask you out doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you. He might just be holding on until he can tell you feel the same.

21. He doesn’t love it when you give other guys attention

However, just because some shy guys don’t mind being in the friend zone doesn’t mean they are okay with you getting with other men. They may listen to all your problems without shaking but draw the line when it comes to boy trouble.

If you find him turning green with jealousy when you mention a date you went on or gets upset when you flirt with others, he likes you. Unfortunately, his need to please you may cause him to ride it out and never say anything about how seeing you with another person truly makes him feel.

22. He tries to befriend your friends

he tries to befriend your friends

In some cases, your shy buddy’s coming out of his comfort zone may not be as overt as clubbing. It might be summoning the courage to talk to a group of people. Even if all he says to your friends is ‘hi,’ depending on how reclusive he is, that could be a pretty big deal to him.

So if he doesn’t stop at meeting your friends but actually hangs with you guys to get to know you in your element, he probably really likes you.

23. He initiates conversation

Shy men are usually not as impulsive as their more outspoken counterparts can be. While a regular guy can walk up to you and strike a conversation on your first meeting, this one may take more time to observe you before approaching.

If he manages to get past the what-ifs and breaks the ice (without needing something urgent from you, that is), it’s a possible sign he has feelings for you. And if that goes well, you may find him initiating conversation more as he gets more comfortable with you.

24. He opens up about himself

If you pay attention, you’ll notice that reserved people generally prefer to keep to themselves. Some are naturally built that way, while others got pushed into a shell by how they’ve been treated in the past. The point is, it can be challenging for people like this, especially men, to be vulnerable.

So see if he wants to talk to you when he’s having a rough day as well as when he’s had the best one. If you find him sharing a lot more about himself than usual, it’s lovemaking him put himself out there like that. 

25. He can’t seem to get mad at you

Not that you should go around pushing people’s buttons to test if they love you, but you get away with a lot when a quiet person likes you. Add their dislike for clashes to the fact that he doesn’t want you to hate him, and you can understand why. 

Although, the dreaded silence that is his norm may make you feel like he’s giving you the silent treatment when he’s really just existing. Once you have a clear understanding of this and see that he doesn’t even seem to have the capacity to stay mad at you, you’re in.

26. He’s a total gentleman with you

Shy men are proof that chivalry isn’t dead as they are the gentlest of their kind. They treat you with the respect you deserve, which is more than you can say for many guys these days. You may not begin on an adrenaline-fueled note, but he’ll win your love steadily, albeit a little slow.

He’s an expert at saying the right things (even if from behind a screen), making you feel special, and can even swoop in sometimes to rescue you from distress. So if you always get preferential treatment from him, it may be a sign he’s deeply attracted to you.

27. He’s interested in what you do

he's interested in what you do

People connect faster when they have things in common; shared interests, similar hobbies, and the likes. However, your introverted prospect doesn’t need a prior claim or even knowledge of what you love before following it up.

He may use cheering you on as an excuse to keep the conversation alive at first, but that can only go on for so long if he doesn’t like you. So if it’s been a while since you told him you were embarking on a wellness journey and he roots for you to date, it might be love.

28. All the signs are there, but he doesn’t make a move

Have you been nodding from point to point since you started reading this list because they all feel familiar, yet he hasn’t done anything about it? I see how that can be confusing, but you shouldn’t be surprised. Fear of ruining whatever little thing you two have going on is one possible reason he’s been holding back. 

He may also be waiting to know for sure if he wants something with you, or all he has is a crush. Men like him usually do not take relationship matters lightly, but that he hasn’t made a move certainly doesn’t mean he’s not into you. 

29. He tells you

Finally, one sign that is as surefire as it gets that a shy guy likes you is when he tells you just that. Unfortunately, it’s not the fastest as far as the signs go because you may have noticed all the above over and over, and he still wouldn’t say a word. Again, this is because he can be very protective of his feelings.

However, when he finally confesses his love for you, the odds of him meaning every word are quite high compared to the fellow who says it to every girl. It might help to draw him out of his shell more quickly if he gets some indication that you are also interested.


How does a shy guy show his love?

Shy men show their love by doing what pleases you, even if it deviates from their norm or makes them a little uncomfortable. You may find him mingling more with your social circle, trying new things with you, and talking to you often. Since initiating conversation usually takes some prepping for this lot, he probably likes you if he does it often with you.

How do shy guys flirt?

In contrast to those who can turn on the charm and roll out witty one-liners, shy guys are a lot tamer in their flirting. You may find him stealing glances at you a lot and looking away as soon as you catch his gaze. He may also smile often when you’re around or ask you a lot of questions about yourself. 

Do shy guys ever make the first move?

Shy people sometimes make the first move when they like someone but not all the time. If they see a little bit of themselves in you (maybe you’re a little bit shy yourself), the chances of them coming forward are higher. But since they’ll likely feel intimidated by anyone they have feelings for, it might help if you opened the floor by first flirting with them.

How do you get a shy guy to admit he likes you?

The fastest way to get a shy guy to admit he has feelings for you has to be complementing his effort with some of your own. It’s a lot of work having to go against your nature to make someone feel loved, so it might feel nice to have that energy reciprocated. Don’t just use him as a listening ear, offer him a shoulder to lean when he needs it too. Explore his world as much as he does yours, and he’ll feel like he found the one.

How do you know a man is your true love?

I don’t think there is a way to tell for sure if you’ve found your true love. I imagine the signs would be something like you feeling like he’s all you’ve been looking for, despite his imperfections. You want to share every part of your life with him and are eager to see him do the same. He’s the true one if you can love him equally at his best and his worst.

Final Thoughts

So, does your shy guy like you? A shy guy who feels love for you can’t do without exhibiting some, if not all, of the signs above. If none of them tallies with your experience with your guy, chances are he doesn’t, but then you may never know for sure unless you ask. I hope this helps put things in perspective. If you liked reading the article, kindly leave a comment and share it thanks.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.

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