What Does It Mean When Your Boyfriend Wants You To Move In With Him? (21 Possible Meanings)

by Michelle Devani

Is your boyfriend asking you to move in with him?

Are you wondering why he would offer this invitation and what this would mean for your relationship?

Well, that’s exactly what we’re going to explore in the guide below. Spoiler alert: this is only a positive thing! Most likely, you’ve made a great impression on him so far. 

However, if you’re looking to increase the lust in your relationship moving forward - rather than falling into a rut and taking each other for granted - I’d urge you to read the next few sentences carefully. 

The part of the male brain most responsible for romantic love is called the ‘Hero’s Instinct’.

When a woman can activate this primal trigger, it releases all sorts of glorious hormones within him. 

By learning to do this consistently, you can make your man fall in love with you again and again. 

I have learned how to do this, and it has made my relationships with men stronger than ever. The ‘honeymoon period’ never ends once you learn how to do this. (Check my personal blog post to discover how this works). 

This is the secret to ever-lasting love with a long-term partner. It would appear that every woman who learned this skill has reported similarly positive results. 

So, if you’re worried about your relationships with men going stale, I’d urge you to read my post on how I discovered the power of the ‘Hero’s Instinct’

With that said, let’s now explore what would inspire a man to invite you to live with him.

21 Possible Reasons Why He Wants To Live Together

When most women hear their men say they want to start living together with them, the first thing that comes to mind is that a marriage proposal is on the way. 

This means their status is about to change from a mere girlfriend to that of a wife. However, a man asking you to move in together doesn’t equal a marriage proposal because men think rather differently from women.

The question to ask is when does it become okay to bring up the conversation of moving in together in a relationship? More so, who should make the offer of moving in together? And are there benefits for moving in together with your boyfriend even though there are no immediate plans to get married to each other?

If your boyfriend is hinting that living together will be a good way to show you that you’re in a serious relationship, he might be onto something. Living together is actually a good sign of a serious relationship. However, it could be that your man is trying to assume more control over you. 

So, exactly what does it mean when your boyfriend wants you to move in with him? Below are 21 possible reasons why he wants both of you to live together.

1. He is ready to take on more responsibilities in the relationship

If your boyfriend has started hinting that he wants to be more involved in your life, it could mean he is ready to be more focused on you. This new focus could include him asking you to move in with him so that you’ll both share house rent, grocery money, utility bills, and other things. 

Before men offer to cohabitate with a woman, they must have thought hard about it. A serious man doesn’t ask a woman to move in with him unless he means to take up responsibility for some things in her life. As such, if you feel you trust and love your boyfriend enough to allow him in your personal space permanently, it might be the best thing for both of you.

 2. He has become more committed to you

he has become more committed to you

One of the signs that reveal the seriousness of a man towards you is when he asks you to move in with him. If you have been worried or skeptical about how much he loves you and he sees your anxiety, he might offer to move in together as a way to show he is committed to you wholeheartedly. 

When men get over their commitment phobia, they tend to become so invested in you that you will wonder if they are the same people trying to avoid commitment before. As such, him asking you to move in with him is his way of assuring you that you have his commitment.

3. He wants to have more time to spend with you

Another reason your boyfriend could ask that you move in with him is that he doesn’t get to spend enough time with you. If you are both busy people who only see each other a few times in a week or month, living together might be a good sign. It means that you both want the relationship to work.

Couples in long-distance relationships or who rarely see each other usually feel the strain of trying to be with the person they love. If you always have to make thorough plans ahead of seeing each other, the decision to live together might be a good idea. 

As such, living together is a viable solution that will end the frustration you feel because you can’t see each other within a short period.

4. He thinks moving in together is the best way to repair your relationship

Has your relationship been experiencing some issues and staying apart is creating more problems that living together can easily resolve? Then, your boyfriend asking you to move in with him is a good decision. When couples move past the honeymoon phase of dating, real issues begin to interfere and test the love they claim to have for each other.

Similarly, when you begin to know someone, you cannot claim you know them so well until you live with them. If your partner thinks living together will help solve the pending issues, it is one of the signs he cares so much and doesn’t want to lose you.

5. You both practically live together already

Do you spend four out of seven days in his house? Does he spend the remaining three of yours? Then, you’re practically roommates. If you both sleep over and spend this much time at each other’s place, you shouldn’t be surprised if he asks you to move in with him. 

Moving in with your man will reduce the hours and money you spend to commute between your house and his house. The same thing goes for him. He will get to see you every day without going through the stress of driving or riding on a bus to do so. 

However, if you think moving in with him is a good sign that you can see each other regularly, go ahead. However, remember that it’s okay not to feel pressured to live with him.

6. He thinks it is a logical solution for your money problems

If you’re having financial issues, asking you to move in with him is one of the signs that your guy has your best interests at heart. He only wants to make things easier for you. One of the most crucial life decisions anyone can make is to ask their partner to move in with them. So, be careful about the way you reject your boyfriend’s offer if that’s the decision you settle for. 

However, if you are at the stage where committing to him is not a problem, sharing a house is a great sign that the relationship is good for you. You get to solve an issue, and henceforth see your favorite person every day.

7. It is the next step in your relationship

All relationships have a natural progression. So, when you reach each level, you and your partner know what to do next. The dating stage starts casually, but with time, you get to know each other better. You will know the similarities or differences between both of you, and the topic of moving in together will begin to pop up. 

The topic will come up in between conversations and one day, your partner will openly ask you to move in with him. This is because he feels the time is right to do so. If you are both on the same wavelength of feelings, it will feel natural rather than strange that he asks you to move in with him.

8. Most of your things are at his place

Do you have most of your items already in his house? If he has given you a key to his house and you go and come as you please, he will probably think you’ll be open to the idea of living together.

If he offered you a permanent space in his house, it also most likely means he wants you there, not just because it makes sense that you move in permanently. Depending on how serious you are about him and if it also seems like the right thing to do, moving in with the guy you’re dating and love is a good sign. 

9. He needs more privacy with you

If you’re dating a man who lives with other people, a time will come that he will seek more privacy than he has where he currently lives. Does he have roommates? If so, this uncomfortable living arrangement might fuel his decision to live together with you.

Reversal might be the case if you’re the one with roommates. In such a scenario, men feel more strongly about asking their women to move in with them than if they are the ones having privacy issues. While you don’t need to be a pushover and quickly take this important step, you should consider if it’s the right time to do so.

10. You both share each other’s things a lot

you both share each other's things a lot

Just like having your things at his house, if you both spend time at each other’s places, chances are that you share items too. If he visits and sleeps over often, he would have shared your toiletries and whatnot. If both of you have reached a level that you are beginning to smell like each other, it means you’re like roommates already.

If you smell like his cologne and he has the smell of your shampoo on him, your similarities have become higher than your differences. And so, you’re both ready to take the leap towards marriage. Even if he doesn’t pop the marriage question yet, him asking you to live with him is a good sign he wants forever with you.

11. He thinks his furniture is more comfortable than yours

As ridiculous as it may sound, your partner can plant seeds of conviction that you move in with him. This could be because he doesn’t like your furniture. If he feels more comfortable in his house more than he does at yours, he will put in much effort to make a convincing case about you moving in with him. 

Having great furniture to sleep on might become appealing to even you, especially if you love them and the man who owns them. Note that, living with someone because of their furniture is not the wisest thing to do. Nevertheless, the offer will have you thinking about how strongly you feel about your partner and whether you want to live with him at any point in the future. 

12. He doesn’t think you should renew your lease

Is your lease up? Are you getting to the serious part of your relationship too? A man in love with you might consider renewing your lease a waste of good money when you can just move in with him.

Even though the success of relationships isn’t dependent on a couple living together, proximity and constant physical play huge roles in enhancing relationships. As such, if you agree that moving into his house is something you want to do, then his logic about moving in with him might be correct.

13. He doesn’t like coming to your house

Most men have a possessive streak that makes them abhor the idea of going over to their woman’s place most of the time. The few who don’t mind doing this are either more in touch with their feminine side or don’t just care about where they get to spend time with their woman.

However, the macho ones want to have you in their space because it makes them feel manly and in charge. Your man could also offer that you live with him because your place of residence is not in the best condition. More so, he doesn’t want you to get into any trouble because of it. This means that he cares a lot about you.

14. He has become more comfortable with being indoors with you

When a guy falls completely in love with you, the pleasures he gets from hanging out with the boys all the time will reduce. Instead, he will want to be with you any chance he gets. As such he will want access to you physically anytime he desires to do so, hence the offer to live with him.

If you understand and share his need for more exclusive access to your time and attention, you will be more inclined to agree about moving in with him.

15. He wants to take care of you more than before

If your guy asks you to move in with him, he probably wants to make sure you’re well taken care of, especially if you haven’t been taking it for yourself. His offer might come after a bout of illness and there’s no one to help you while you recover. 

He might say his offer is temporary, but at least it shows he loves you and might want to make things more permanent than he initially lets on. Also, his offer might be because he feels he has been underperforming in his role as a loving boyfriend. As such, he wants to do better for you.

16. He wants you to live a life of convenience, devoid of stress

Another reason your partner might ask you to move in with him is that he wants to be the one helping out with your domestic chores and relieve you of the daily stress you go through. He might want to be there when your bathroom sink starts leaking and he knows you can’t fix it immediately. 

He wants to help you prepare a bowl of chicken soup when you have the flu or he wants to be the one to gently apply a hot water bag treatment on your abdomen when your menstrual cramps hit. You can gently probe him to understand why he wants to live with you, especially if you can do all of the above yourself. 

17. He is feeling insecure about your commitment to him

There are wonderful reasons why your guy wants both of you to live together. However, there are also unpleasant reasons. Observing the recent events in your relationship and the way he's been acting will give you an idea of why he made the offer.

If you can’t find a genuine reason to move in with him at the time, and he’s been acting weirdly, it could mean he is unsure about you or your feelings for him.

18. He is testing out what living together will be like

When a man has decided he wants to be with you on a long-term basis, he will want to be very sure before he makes any plan towards marriage. He will suggest that you should both live together to know if the compatibility extends to coexisting in the same home.

19. He plans to propose you both get married soon

he plans to propose you both get married soon

If the relationship has progressed to the stage that you’re sure you will get married to him, it shouldn’t surprise you that he suggests moving in together. If he has been bringing up topics on marriage, children, mortgage, and buying a home, it’s normal to expect an offer of living together too. If you’re ready to go the route of marriage too, deciding to live with him will be easy for you. 

20. It is just a practical idea for him

Your partner might have no special reasons for asking you to move in with him except for the fact that it is a reasonable idea. Meaning, he thinks living apart makes no sense when you could be seeing each other at various times of the day.

While this reason is not as romantic as some, it might work for both of you if you are a logical person too. However, if you lean more towards romantic gestures, this approach might not appeal to you all that much.

21. He wants you to know him better than you already do

Distance doesn’t usually make it easy to communicate effectively. More so, nonverbal cues are sometimes more important than spoken words. If your partner thinks living together will help both of you know each other better, he will suggest that you move in with him. 

Also, if he is thinking of spending the rest of his life with you, he will want to create an atmosphere that allows him to become vulnerable to you, so you know who he is when no one else is watching. 

FAQs

How long should you wait to move in with your boyfriend?

Usually, you would know when it feels right to move in with your boyfriend and so, it’s not wise to put a time frame when deciding this.

How long should you be with someone before moving in with them?

You should move in with someone only when you’re sure they want to move in with you for the right reasons. Do they want you in their lives? If yes, you’ll know the exact moment to move in with them.

How do you know if he wants you to move in with him?

He will leave hints such as convincing you to leave more of your stuff at his house, give you a key or have you stay over more than you are away from his place.

How do you know if you and your partner are ready to move in together?

You’d have had several conversations about moving in together and you’ve weighed both the pros and cons of doing so. Both of you will know when it feels perfect to move in together because it is a big deal you can’t afford to mess up.

Can moving in together ruin a relationship?

If neither of you is ready to live together and you do so, it can cause problems for both of you. You’ll both get on each other’s nerves and the idea of cohabitating will feel more like torture than a good thing.

Also, there is a difference between how a man and a woman relates to living together in relationships. The girlfriend is hearing marriage bells ringing, while the boyfriend is simply thinking of how to deepen intimacy in the relationship before taking the next step towards marriage. 

In Conclusion 

More often than not, when your boyfriend asks you to move in with him, it is because he cherishes you and needs more time to continue doing so. However, you might not be ready for that big step, especially if your initial thought doesn’t eventually match his reason for offering to share his home with you.

These possible reasons should help you question him on why he wants to live together when he is yet to ask you to marry him.

Did this post help answer some of your questions? Please leave a comment and share with someone who might need this too.

Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.

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