What Does It Mean When Your Ex Adds You Back on Social Media? (11 Possible Things)

Last updated on July 12, 2024 by Michelle Devani

Did you recently notice that your ex has added you back on social media?

Perhaps it’s your first time seeing him online or offline since your break-up - and now you’re wondering what has inspired him to make this digital connection. 

It can be a confusing and perhaps distressing situation - especially if you haven’t seen his face in years. 

So, what does it mean?

The guide below will help you work this out. It features the most common reasons why an ex will reach out to try and make a connection on social media. 

But first, I have to tell you about this awesome online tool I recently discovered. 

It’s a powerful and discreet background checker and communications tracker.

While adding your ex on social media is likely to give you access to a lot of his personal details and a brief history of his online communications, this tool goes one step further. 

It will allow you to discover who he has been privately calling and messaging the most, what apps he is using, what contact details he has registered and more.

More often than not, this tool will give you some strong clues as to why he’s getting in touch again. 

It only requires a few of his basic details to get started, and it’s 100% discreet, so what have you got to lose?

This is the quickest and most effective way to find out what’s been going on while you’ve been gone. 

With that said, here are some ideas for what could be motivating your ex to add you on social media.

The relationship between you and your ex might have ended. In this case, usually the relationship between you two as friends might have ended as well. During the break-up moment there might be a fight between you and your ex. However, time flies, you guys might have made up and are more mature now.

So don't be surprised if you wake up in a gloomy morning and suddenly see your ex adds you back on social media after a long long time you guys unfollowed each other. Don't be too shocked or happy about that. Below, I discuss the reason why your ex adds you back on social media!


What Does It Mean When Your Ex Adds You Back on Social Media?

So, you are the ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend of someone now. It’s not a fun position to be in; I understand that. Now, you have heard back from them after all of this time! 

What are you to do, and what does it mean when your ex adds you back on social media? For example, out of the blue, you get a friend request from an ex-girlfriend you haven’t seen or talked to in forever!

How do you respond to this, and why is your ex-girlfriend all of a sudden interested in being your friend on Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter? 

You are probably perplexed, wondering if the break-up is really over if she is just checking on you to see if you are over the heartbreak you went through, or if she is just trying to have more followers on Instagram!

If your ex adds you to Instagram or Facebook, you might think the break-up isn’t over, which can give you mixed signals. So, how do you get to the bottom of things? Let’s explore the possible reason that your ex is adding to Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, or some other social media account.

1. He or she wants to know what is new with you

It may be that your ex wants to know how you are doing because the man (or woman) is curious about your well-being. This man or woman may just want to know if you are okay, if you’ve moved on with your life, or if you are dating a new guy or gal. They may want to know how well you are coping with things.

2. He or she wants to know if you are dating someone new

he or she wants to know if you are dating someone new

There very well be some jealousy issues going on. If your old guy or gal has tried to re-enter your world, he or she may be hoping you haven’t moved on with your life. Are you still pining for your ex? Do you think about the guy or gal all the time? These questions may be racking your ex’s brain.

3. He or she has been thinking about you a lot

If you have been on his or her mind a lot lately, they may be wanting to reconnect. Maybe they have been thinking about the good times the two of you have had in the past. Perhaps this guy or gal just wants to know if you have been thinking about them as well.

4. He or she wants to know if you are okay

Maybe your ex wants to know if you have moved on with your life. Are you doing okay after the rough breakup you went through? Are you still suffering from the harsh breakup he or she threw your way? He or she may just feel guilty and want to be sure you are coping in a healthy way.

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5. He or she has been feeling lonely

There’s a very good chance that your ex just misses you. Maybe he wants to know if you are feeling the same way. He or she may not have anyone special in their life, and you are on their mind all the time. Think about whether you want to help fill a void in their world or if you’d rather keep your distance from the whole situation.

6. He or she wants to talk to you about something

If you have done a good job at breaking things off by stopping all communication with your ex-partner, he or she may just be trying to get back in touch with you. Maybe you left something at their house, or an old friend has asked him or her to get back in touch with you on their behalf.

7. He or she wants to be friends again

Enough time has passed, and your ex is ready to be friends like you once were. Are you ready to be friends again with him or her? Make sure you think long and hard about it before you follow him or her again on social media.

8. He or she just wants to build up his or her friends on social media

It’s very true that many people want to just build up the number of followers they have on social media. Your ex might just want to increase his or her count of friends. Do you feel the same way about the topic?

9. He or she wants to show others what you look like

I have actually had exes add me to social media so that they could tell their friends, “Look! I dated her! Isn’t she a hottie?” It is a possibility your ex just wants to show you off to other people.

10. He or she wants to feel confident again

Maybe your ex wants to feel wanted again, to see if you are still pining over him or her, or miss him or her a great deal. Maybe they just want to know if you still want to be with them to boost their self-esteem. 

11. He or she wants you back

Of course, what you may hope to be the case is that your ex wants you back. Maybe he or she really wants to be in touch with you so that he or she can rekindle the fire that was once there. Maybe they’ve missed you and thought long and hard about the reasons the two of you broke up. Perhaps they want to change your relationship status.

What You Should Do If Your Ex Adds You Back on Social Media

what you should do if your ex adds you back on social media

1. If you want him or her back

By all means, go ahead and accept your ex as a new friend! Follow them on social media, and see if they’ve moved on. Are they dating someone new? You might want to message them to find out what they are up to. Make it a casual conversation to get started; later, you can ask them how they feel about the breakup, or better yet, ask them out for something like coffee.

2. If you want to be just friends

If you still want to be friends with your ex, you should go ahead and add them as a friend or follow them on social media. Just make sure that the message is clear; you only want to be friends. If they send you a DM, keep it friendly and casual. If you can tell they actually want to be more than just friends, let them know that you have moved on in your dating life.

3. If you want nothing to do with him or her

Do not follow them or add them to your social media accounts/channels. Don’t accept them as a friend. If you ended things on bad terms, you don’t need to rehash old issues or argue about who broke up with who. It’s over and in the past. There’s no reason to bring all of the old issues up again. Instead, just ignore them, and continue to heal from the breakup.

4. If you don’t know how you feel

If you are unsure of what to do, don’t add them - at least not right now. There’s no ticking clock saying that you need to respond right away. Take your time and think about how this will affect your life. Do you want to let them see your private moments? Do you want them to be part of your daily feed? Remember, you may have to see what they are up to, as well.

If you don’t know if you want them back in your world, just don’t make a quick decision. Think it through. There really is no need to rush things. Consider talking over this dilemma with your friends, family, or even a trained counselor - someone who can understand what you’ve been through with this person and help you decide if you should add them to your social media life.


Why did my ex add me back on social media?

If your ex adds you back on social media, he may be suffering from jealousy because you are dating someone new, or perhaps he wonders what the reason you broke up is. The best way to determine what is going on is to talk to your ex about it.

What does it mean when your ex comes back?

Usually, it means that your ex is wanting to get in a relationship with you once again. Maybe he is feeling nostalgic and wanting to look at old photos of the two of you. What kind of memories did you share? Do you think your ex misses you?

Is my ex trying to get my attention on social media?

If your ex tries to get you to follow his or her Instagram account, he or she may be trying to find ways to get your attention once again. They may want to be in a relationship with you once again. Guys and girls frequently act mysteriously on social media.

Why does my ex post about me?

If your ex has posted photos of you on social media after you have broken up, he or she may be suffering from curiosity, wondering what your reaction will be to his or her post. This is not the normal behavior of guys or girls, but you never know.

Should you follow your ex back on social media?

If your ex-boyfriend has asked you to follow him back on social media, you should follow him if you guys are on speaking terms and still like each other as friends. If you guys are not on good terms, you should let your ex be something of the past.

To Sum It All Up

Exes often come back into our lives through social media. What signs have you seen that your ex wants you back? Leave a message in the comments section about your ex-relationship. We’d love to hear from you! Also, please share this post on your social media channels!

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.

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