How To Know If A Girl Likes You But Pretends To Hate You (33 Signs)

Last updated on June 13, 2024 by Michelle Devani

Are you unsure whether a particular woman likes you or hates you?

This might sound like an odd question, but these emotions really aren’t too far separated.

The opposite of love is indifference.

If she’s putting the energy into hating you, it could be that she’s pretending just to get your attention. These mind games are more common than they should be…

Never mind. 

In this guide, I’m going to help you out by revealing some of the most clearcut signs that a woman likes you, but is pretending to hate you.

But, before we start, let me give you a bonus tip that arguably provides the quickest and most effective way to know how a woman feels about you. 

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Plus, it’s 100% discreet, so there’s absolutely zero danger of her finding out that this super-intelligent device is tracking her.

With that said, this woman could already be showing some signs that she actually likes you, even if it looks like she hates you on the surface. 

Scroll down to get an idea of what these signs are.

Contents

33 Signs To Know If A Girl Likes You But Pretends To Hate You

You may be working in a busy office with a particular girl always picking on you, opposing the things you say, but buying you your favorite coffee whenever she goes out for lunch break. So, it means that she's there like she's not, and you're confused if she likes you or not.

Not all girls know how to express themselves. They would feel that as a man, you should notice how beautiful they are soon enough to ask them out, or crave to be in a relationship with them. This makes up part of the reasons a girl could pretend to hate a guy when she likes him.

It could also be her way of communicating and saying she likes you. You may be surprised about this, but most girls have some sort of pride attached to their personality and would prefer to be treated as a queen. This is why you see them pretend not to like a guy even when they do.

If you observe well, there could be a girl you’re talking to, who gives you attitude but cares a bit for you. Or, looks out for you, and makes you unsure if she likes you or not. If there is, here are 33 signs on how to know if a girl likes you but pretends to hate you.

1. She makes comments about everything that concerns you behind you

You'd be wondering why someone would prefer to talk behind you when she likes you. This happens a lot, especially with girls that have low self-esteem. They believe they're not good enough to have physical contact with you, so they prefer to do it behind you.

When a girl pretends to hate you, she would say both nice and bad things about you to others without making the mistake of saying them to you face-to-face. This is one of the signs you can use to know if a girl likes you, but pretends to hate you.

2. She’ll reluctantly do the things you say at her time

It's normal for most people to know when you give them a good piece of advice and use it. They would listen to you and be interested in anything you have to say, especially if it plays a big role in the challenges they're facing. 

But, this is different with a girl who likes you and pretends to hate you. She would pretend not to hear or regard anything you're saying at the moment. That doesn't mean she didn't use them to better herself. If a girl does this to you, it's clear that she's pretending to hate you.

3. All her friends would know about you secretly

Girls talk about many things within themselves. A good indicator about you or your personality is when a girl tells her friends about you. She may pretend like she's not interested in you, but she'll talk about you to her friends as often as they care to listen.

You may only get to know this if you and her have mutual friends. If she's introverted, she could tell only her best friend. You could know this if you observe her friend talking to you in a familiar or friendly way, as if you've both met before.

4. She could sound saucy when she’s around you

Some other signs that you should look out for are her actions. Actions speak more when it comes to situations like this. Her body language, speech tone, and general attitude are obvious signs to show how much she likes you and wants to be noticed.

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She’ll behave a certain way when she sees you. Even when you come in mid-way into any discussion, her manner of approach to certain things would automatically change. It's a strong sign that she likes you and she's ready to know you if given the chance to.

5. She’ll look out for you

Most women who look out for people don't make it obvious to the people they're looking out for. They could go as far as being familiar with people to know the dangers you're most likely to face in the future.

So, if you notice your lunch being delivered on time even when you didn't ask for it, that could be a lady who likes you but is pretending to hate you. This could be her letting her actions speak more to you. You could try looking for your secret admirer.

6. If you’re into business, she’d refer you to people without your knowledge

For some women, it's not a big deal to naturally touch on different topics of discussion when talking to people. The same thing applies when a girl likes you but refuses to acknowledge that she's interested in you. 

If she has true feelings for you, she'll do her best to make you grow whether you know it or not. women do this for people they care about a lot, whether they reciprocate it or not. This is one of the subtle signals that a girl is pretending to hate you.

7. She’ll indirectly seek your opinion on many things

Women feel secure getting advice from someone she secretly admires. She believes everything he says is magical and good enough to apply to her daily life. If she's interested in starting a relationship with him, she'll go to him with all her problems.

This is another sign you could use to know when a girl likes you but is pretending to hate you. She would always come to you for advice, whether she's dating someone or not. You'd even notice her come to you with minor issues she can solve.

8. Her general appearance would be perfect when she knows she’ll see you

When most women secretly like a guy and would want to be in a relationship with him, they would do anything to get his attention including their physical appearance. You never know, but they'll study you well enough to know how you like your girl to dress.

They'll dress that way whenever they know they'll bump into you on a two-way street. They may not necessarily talk to you but would do everything to make them look attractive to you. That's a good sign that a girl likes you secretly.

9. She’ll always want you around

she'll always want you around

There's no way you won't want to see your crush around you always. When a girl likes you, this is one of the signs you'll see. It would be more obvious when she needs your attention for a little thing like increasing her phone screen brightness. 

She would always look for something she can use to spend time with you. Even when she claims she's busy, she'd only ask for your help, and not any other person’s. That's a sign to know when a girl pretends to dislike you.

10. When you say something to displease her, she’ll feel really bad

When a girl likes you, she's scared of you seeing her flaws. This is why most girls try to be as perfect as they can be whenever they're around guys they like. They'll talk in ways to please you and only contribute when you're around.

They expect you to only say nice things to them and when you don't, it affects their self-esteem. So, if you notice her mood swings when you say something a bit mean playfully, that's a great sign that she likes you, but is pretending to hate you.

11. She would take care of your belongings when you’re not around

Imagine traveling away from your home and getting back to see your car as sparkling as ever. You could think it's a nice neighbor or one of your good friends, only to hear a girl make an indirect comment about it to you in the weirdest way.

It could make you wonder. But, what you should know is that, no girl would go out of her way to do anything to please you if she doesn't want something from you. If a girl does this, you should see the sign that she likes you secretly.

12. You’ll always have a warning sign from her about bad things

As simple as “be careful out there. There are signs of a possible heavy rainfall” or “be careful not to get robbed.” Those are warning signs from a girl who's making it obvious that she wants you back safe, meaning she likes and cares about you.

This is not behavior from a girl who wants to be just a friend. It comes from the heart and even though she may not say it directly to you, she likes you enough to be in a relationship with her and expects you to see it someday.

13. She could get close to your family if they’re around

Ever heard of stalkers? Most girls know how to stalk the men they like. It doesn't matter if you're already in a relationship or not. They would find out everything they need to know about you from mutual friends or social media.

They could know your family from these sources and get to know them more. You could be surprised to see that quiet coworker at the office helping your mother unpack her grocery bags on a beautiful Sunday afternoon. That's one of the signs a girl is pretending to dislike you.

14. She’ll tell off every guy that comes to her

Have you ever heard of girls putting guys in the friend zone? If yes, you should know that it's always because there's another guy out there that they see themselves with more than the guy who likes them. If you observe this, you'll know.

She would remain single for a while and would give no other guy except you the chance to talk. So, if you talk to her and hear her complain about every guy she meets, she's mean to you, but would prefer to always be around you, that's a sign she's pretending to hate you. 

15. Whenever you talk about your ex or relationship, she’ll pay deaf ears to it

One of the best signs you can use to know if a girl likes you but pretends not to, is her reaction when you're talking about other girls. How does she behave when you talk about your ex, girlfriend, or other girls you relate with?

She could either sound jealous, give a fake smile, keep quiet, or change the topic immediately. This is one of the subtle ways you can tell when a girl likes you and wants to be in a relationship with you, but pretends to dislike you.

16. She’ll try to send off any female friend she sees with you

A girl who pretends to hate you would take off all minor distractions to make her be in the spotlight. If she observes you concentrating on a particular girl or having a best female friend, she'd find a way to reduce the way they relate with you. 

Some girls do this in a friendly way while others do it forcefully. She could go as far as telling you a few bad things to make you relate less with them. This is one of the signs you could use to know when a girl is pretending to dislike you.

17. Her lifestyle will be programmed in a way that would make you notice her

A girl would change her lifestyle just to get your attention. If she is wild, she'll do things calmly. If she was calm and observed that you like wild girls, she would program herself to be that way.

She'll start living a good life, talking about it, and making it obvious to you, the changes she has tried to make in her life. She could even go as far as doing almost the same things you do, reading the kind of books you love reading, and relating with the people you love most.

18. She may delay responding to your messages, but she always will

she may delay responding to your messages but she always will

Is there any girl you talk to who doesn't delay responding to your messages, but responds well with apologies when she does? You could even observe that if you tell her that you're tired of her delayed responses, she could apologize but won't change for the better.

If she doesn't apologize, she could try her best to respond quicker than she did at first. That's because she doesn't want to lose that connection or stop chatting with you. That's one of the signs that a girl likes you but wants to hide it.

19. You can count on her as your defender whether you’re there or not

Not all women who say they don't like you mean it. The most interesting thing about this part is that you may think she dislikes you, only to hear from others about how well she defends you when you're not around. 

She may pretend not to know any of those things when you ask her, but deep down, she'll be happy you're grateful for her effort. She'll also be happy that she could make you talk to her. That's one of the signs a girl secretly likes you even when she claims she doesn't.

20. She’ll tell you about the things you don’t need to know about her

If a girl claims to be uninterested in you but keeps telling you things about her family members or personal life, she may not be truthful. It takes a certain level of trust to open up to someone that way. 

So, if you observe her always opening up to you about her personal affairs, it means she has a soft spot for you somewhere. This is one of the signs you can use to know when a lady likes you but pretends she doesn't. You should look out for it.

21. Her level of pride will increase when she talks to you

You could be wondering what could make a woman's command of English suddenly become so good when she starts talking to you. If this happens when you're meeting for the first time, it's okay. But, if it's a woman you've known for a while, that may be her level of pride increasing.

You'll see it from her body language, facial expressions, and tone when she's responding to anything you say. She could pretend to be rude, but deep down the woman feels something good for you.

22. She’ll bring up discussions about you with other people

If a lady likes you but doesn't want to show it for some personal reasons, she could start gossiping about you unknowingly. Sometimes, it may be good, other times it could be bad. But, that could be because she's not getting the kind of attention she needs from you.

At the same time, she doesn't want to be the first to approach you or give you such attention. Because of that, she wouldn't mind discussing you with other people. This is one of the signs she likes secretly.

23. If you look sad, she’ll show some kindness in a nonchalant manner

Women who pretend to dislike you have a way of comforting you when you're sad. They don't do it like the rest of the people who care about you. They do it in ways that you can’t suspect their care but feel it lovingly.

So, they could offer you a drive home and when you show your gratitude, they either don't accept it or leave you hanging. This is one of the signs for you to know a woman likes you but doesn't want to show it.

24. She’ll be among the first to like your posts on social media

You know those times when you think you're posting crap on your social media accounts, but you keep getting likes from a particular girl even when she's mean to you in reality? You could be surprised to know that the same girl is interested in you.

You may not need to follow her back. She could follow you, like, and comment on your photos. Sometimes, she could go as far as sharing your posts on her wall or story to get your attention.

25. You may hear her ask other people about you

You'll hear questions like “is he married?” “Does he have a girlfriend?” At first, you may be wondering why a woman would ask those questions about you when she pretends to be uninterested in you.

The truth is, she may just want you to say hi first or recognize her as a person. When a girl shows such interest in you by asking other people about your life, it means she could like you even when she pretends not to. It's one of the signs you should look out for.

26. She would find pleasure in teasing you

If there's any woman or women out there who tend to tease you in different ways all the time, they could be interested in being in a relationship with you. She would do it to you whether it's on the phone or face-to-face.

You'll see her enjoying making fun of the things she finds attractive in you. He won't care if you like her gestures or not. This is one of the signs you can use to know when a lady likes you but pretends to dislike you.

27. Your presence would play a great role in her life

your presence would play a great role in her life

You may be surprised to know that a girl likes you so much that your presence makes her feel warm and accepted. She may not necessarily talk to you or she may sound mean when you try to talk to her.

But, you'll observe this sense of peace she gets when you step into the environment. If you get close to her and sit, she may say nothing harsh. This is one of the signs for you to know that a girl is interested in you, but pretends she's not.

28. She may pretend she’s too busy for you, but will always have time for you

If a woman shows you her busy side, but always has the time to listen to you or offer help whenever you need her, she's interested in you. Because of how proud she is, she may not want to let down her guards to say she's less busy for you, but if you ask, she’ll help.

Most women do this to avoid being taken for granted by men. They believe if they don't hide their feelings, they may fall into the category of women that men use in playing games. 

29. You may not know, but she’ll get jealous when you talk to other girls

When you and another girl laugh and she's around, she would be unable to ignore that happiness you have with another woman. She would feel she should be the one talking to you in such a relaxing and friendly manner. That's jealousy and it could make her do wrong things.

Some expressive women who find themselves in a situation like this would do everything to distract the girl you're talking to, just to interrupt the talk and laughter. This is one of the signs you get when a girl secretly likes you but shows she doesn't.

30. She tends to support you when others are against you

When a girl has strong feelings for you but refuses to admit it, she'll do her best to support you, whether you're there or not. She may not do it forcefully, but she'll find a way to pull strings to hide your bad deeds.

She could make excuses for you, especially when she's sure you didn't make mistakes intentionally. She will have your back and support you when you least expect. That's one of the signs you can use to know when a girl likes you but pretends not to.

31. She would go the extra mile to see you happy even when she claims she doesn’t care

If you feel a girl dislikes you, one thing you should look out for are the little things she does to help you. If she doesn't do anything to help you, then she doesn't care. But, if she does what other people can't do for you, it means she cares more than you can imagine.

Not every guy would do this, especially the one that is not interested in having anything to do with you. But, when a girl is interested in you, she'd do anything she can to make you happy.

32. Her body language will change whenever she sees you around

A girl’s body language will always change whenever she's around a guy she likes, whether she plans it or not. She'll be careful about how she talks to other men, relate with women, and try to make everything about her perfect.

If a girl shows her best behavior whenever you're around, it means she has strong feelings for you. She may not say this directly to you, but you'll see it in her attitude when you're around compared to other men. That's one of the signs a woman is interested in you.

33. She’ll feel insecure about any flaw you mention to her

When a woman likes you, she takes any and everything you say to heart. It doesn't matter if it's good or bad. When you say something good about her, it makes her smile. But, when it's something bad, it will make her feel insecure.

Whether you're joking or not, it'll go a long way to impact her positively or negatively. It's something that may hurt her for life. If you see any girl you affect this way, it's one of the signs she's interested in you but pretending not to be.

FAQs

How can you tell if a girl pretends to like you?

She’ll be nonchalant about you in every possible way. This means that she'll care less about your problems. She may do things to lower your self-esteem and emphasize your weakness for her selfish aims. There would be little or no connection between you two, and any relationship you have would go south when she's tired of pretending.

How do you know that a girl hates you?

They force everything they do with you, whether it's communication, career plans, and anything positive. They feel uncomfortable being in the same environment as you and would do anything to avoid getting involved in something that involves you. These are a few ways to know when a girl hates you.

What does it mean when a girl pretends not to see you?

She could be avoiding eye contact. She could also be avoiding having any kind of conversation with you. When a girl pretends not to see you, she may either have a huge crush on you that she can't control, or she dislikes you so much that she doesn't want to see you in the same environment as her.

How do you know if a girl is hiding her feelings and secretly wants you?

The first thing that happens to a girl who secretly wants you is a change in body language. She would do everything in her power to have a conversation with you, maintain flirty eye contact, and check up on you as often as possible. She would also pay attention to little details and ask questions about them.

How do you impress a girl if she is not interested in you?

First, you should accept yourself, have high self-esteem and self-confidence. Don't be on her face all the time. Accept her ways and keep everything cool with her. Whenever she needs to talk to someone, listen to her, and don't suggest anything except she asks you to. 

In Conclusion

You should always remember that not all girls are the same. Depending on her personality, there are a thousand signs to know if a girl likes you but pretends to hate you. You could start with these 33 signs I've mentioned and see how things go. Don't forget to drop a comment and share this with others.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.

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