Are you one of the interesting people that have lot luckiness, beauty, goods, achievement and good lifestyle in your life? Or a person who has a charming personality that always gets compliments and makes other get envy or have a curiosity to know about your life? If your answer is yes, maybe you have the stalker in life that trying to look for about your daily activities. Honestly, the stalker is the one person that always give their focus on your life (about your activities and conditions). They always try to get information about yours without you get aware of their actions. They try to presence in your around. They are may be your secret admirer (always love what you do and try to do same) or hater (always love to compare their life with your life).
In definition, as a mentioned on the research, the people that have stalking behavior generally love to do harassment and intimidation and may include following the victim in person or monitoring them. The Stalking is a term that used in psychiatry and psychology (with different definitions). In jurisdictions, the behavior of stalking that extremely do harassment and intimidation to their victim as well as consider as criminal violent. They were considered doing criminal violent when they are too obsessive for their victims.
Here, we can talk about the signs you have a stalker (your secret admire). There are some signs that you can notice to detect the stalker around you. It is not easy to find them because they are good in camouflage. Besides they also intelligent in action to hide what they do.
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- Their memory is saved in your memory
As the mentioned above, the stalkers are the people that love to give their focus on you. They love to follow your activities and try to always stay around you. It is not disturbing action and not a crime if they are still in their boundaries. For the first time, you can not detect them but you can remember their face. You can feel if their face is too familiar for you.
- Have good connection with your topics
If you have friends that always know or easy to connect with you (when talking), they have much knowledge about your topics whereas they do not like the topics (as long as you know), it is a sign if they are one of your stalkers. Stalker always knows your interest topics because they always listen talking secretly.
- Love to like your status on social media
You are not a consistent person that write or post a status on your social media? If you are sure, you are not but you always find the same person that always like your status or your post on social media (facebook, twitter, snap chat or Instagram) you can give signs if they are the one your stalkers. The deep stalker set the notification on your social media account to know your newest post. They always want to know the most update post of yours.
- Watch each clue
There is no person that 100 % success manipulate their feeling. It is the good news for you if you want to find your stalker. Yep, you have to watch each clue that collects them and makes notice to get sure. It is not easy if they do good manipulation, top in camouflage. They can act like they do not know about you.
- Receive the surprised presents and letters without the source of name and address
As a social human, receiving the surprise presents and letters that come constantly in each day is the one of happiness in life. But, if you have presents and letters without the source of name and address, what are you going to feel? Curious? Yes, absolutely. You can feel you get the challenge to find them.
- They know about you more than you show off in your social community
Because they always follow your daily activities secretly, sometimes you do not aware if there is a person that know about you more than what you show off in your social community. Maybe they are similar with paparazzi that record your moments but without the camera.
- They do not know the boundaries of your privacy
Do not have your privacy is your dangerous and frustrating things because anything that ought to not to be known by other, they know. It is the bad stalker job!
- Give notice signs of damage for yours (home or close friend)
After you do not get progress in your quest, you feel give up and determine to stop about the stalker that attends in your life? You think if you stop, the stalker also would stop? Unfortunately, there is no give up mental for the stalker. They will give you notice signs of damage for yours, what you have, such as your home, property or your close friend. They will try to use silly way to get your attention.
- Really want to know your detail (ask where are you going and what are you doing)
For some stalkers that do not have bravery, they will try to connect and ask you “where are you going today?” or “what are you going today” only on social media or messages. It is disturbing messages if you have a busy day.
- Get strong jealousy
The person that love to give focus on their object will get strong jealousy if their target (you) has new life. You have a new relationship with a cute boyfriend is not good news for the stalker. They will get strong jealousy and will try to give a notice to you. They will feel if you will be lost from their hand.
- Manipulate the situations (for their reasons to always meet you)
All of them are manipulation people. They can manipulate their identity and also the situations to always meet you naturally. It can be awarded to you if the situations are set by them (stalker).
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More Stalkers Signs
Besides, the type of stalker mental disorder, they also have common and special personalities. Generally, the common of personalities of them:
- Self-interested/ egoistic/ selfishness
- Self-centered (narcissistic) behaviors
- Having domestic violence history.
- Inability to deal with rejection
- Obsessive, controlling and compulsive are their special personalities
- Having impulsiveness
- Suffering their victims (targets) because they have delusions or harsh mental illness that meddle with their reality perception
- Jealousy/ resentfulness
- Having manipulative/ camouflaged behavior
- Badly adaptive behaviors in sexuality
- Tricking/ deceptiveness in social relation
- Having awkwardness in social relation, not comfort, or isolated
- Usually having an instant history of falling in love
- Depends on other views to judge themselves values
- Having low self-respect/ low self-esteem
However, the stalker mental disorder is the illness mental health that needs psychiatry therapy. As the victims, we have to know and try to understand about their illness mental and have to aware of the conditions of our around to detect them in early time.
In this case, the stalkers may means that they have interest on you but way too afraid to say directly. Nowadays, the word of stalker is common use in teenagers in terms to identify the person who love them. Thus, there are many signs you have a stalker who just maybe want to love you right.
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The Types of Stalker
For the many reasons, if you feel you need your privacy life and you feel the stalker is the disturbing person, you have to stop them. It can be made easier if you can classify them into five types.
This is a stalker that comes from your past. They usually have the same feeling and interest with you until now. The rejected stalkers are dangerous because the most common of them is pursue their victim (you). They can not accept the end of the relationship. They are still loving but can not be communicated with you.
For the intimacy stalkers, their love feeling and believing on you are stronger. They have enough confidence if you are a true love. Having a relationship with you is their dream because they believe, you are the best spouse. This is the stalker mental disorder that needs psychiatric treatment.
In this type of stalker mental disorder, know their victims (you) are not interesting for them. They only want to get a relationship with you. They have an obsession to have you but they are incompetent people that can not communicate it directly because they do not have support for the social skills. The incompetent stalkers need legal sanctions and possible mental health treatment such as social skills training.
This is the type of stalker mental disorder that have high jealousy. They have big fear and apprehension. Besides having big fear and apprehension, they also put their victims on sole intention. Recovering from psychiatric treatment for the resentful stalker mental disorder is difficult in engagement therapy.
Maybe this is the most dangerous type of stalker mental disorder because the predatory stalkers have preparing to assault their victims sexually. They love to stalk their victims and seldom to give a warning for their victims. It is the reason why the predatory stalkers are the most type of stalker mental disorder, they are not easy to be detected.
6. Unrelieved Love
That stalkers maybe the one who loves you the most but never be able to hold you for real. That’s why, they stalk on you just to know you better, or just to feel curious, of just to make them feel like you love them back.
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Tips for Your Privacy
Besides having awareness with the conditions of our around, we also have to find some ways to get the safety. Here, there are some strategies to protect yourself from the stalker’s victims:
- Terminate to stop to contact the person that love to find the detail information about you. The person that loves to stalk or harassing your detail information like your daily activities, your weekly plan and your detail profile such as address, phone number, and your families.
- Hold your phone everywhere you go. You have to set your phone easily to use in emergency conditions.
- Listen to your intuition! The intuition is an impulsive feeling that can catch negative or dangerous vibes around you so you have to believe your intuition.
- Do not come back to your home. If you feel a stalker has detail information about your house such as address and the conditions of your home if you think you are not safe you can leave your home for several times. You can go to your family house in a different city.
- Do not go everywhere alone. The stalker can feel if they find the good time when you go everywhere alone.
- Be aware of your information that you are posted on social media.
A stalker is a person that do not know about their victim’s privacy. They do not care about your life because they have too much obsession on you. Being aware and courage every time is the best solution to get you free and watch out the signs you have a stalker.
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