Healing Things To Say To Your Best Friend After A Fight (31 Things To Say to Break The Ice)

Last updated on April 13, 2024 by Michelle Devani

Having a best friend is like having a sibling from another parent. It's someone you can bond with, create good memories with, confide in, and tell some of your secrets to. Not everyone has a best friend, but it's something many people wish to have to complement their lives, even though they may not admit it.

Because of how strong a friendship bond could be, it brings many positive and negative impacts on the individuals involved. The positive effects include love, understanding each other, honesty, truth, support, good feelings, having fun, making plans, and laughing together.

The negative impacts include jealousy if one friend gives more preference or attention to someone else or disagreement when making certain decisions. It could be heartbreak when one friend disappoints the other, especially on a special day; these and more are a few things that cause a fight between best friends.

Best friends fight and may not talk to each other for a while. It's inevitable. The situation may be so sensitive that they need to be careful what they say to their best friend when they reconcile. If you're in this situation and you need a guide, here are 31 things to say to your best friend after a fight.


31 Things To Say To Your Best Friend After A Fight

1. “I am really sorry.”

One of the first things to say to your best friend when you hurt them is how sorry you are. It's one way to calm them. No matter how bad the situation is, saying "I'm sorry" will soften their heart to listen to you.

Depending on the kind of best friend you have, you could say it in different ways to them. You could be playful, sound remorseful, or fix an appointment to say it. Some of them require a public apology, especially when they're sure you're more at fault in the situation. This is one of the things to say to your best friend after a quarrel or an argument.

2. “I didn't mean to hurt you.”

i didn't mean to hurt you

Sometimes, it's better to start by telling them you didn't mean to do the wrong things you did to hurt them. Your best friend may not want to hear an apology, but the reason why you hurt them. Friendship is a kind of relationship where people have feelings, and it's easy to get hurt, especially when you cherish the person so much.

Saying this to them is an assurance that you didn't plan your actions, and anything that caused the fight between you two was a mistake you never knew would happen. This will eliminate already planned arguments from them and gradually begin to restore your friendship.

3. “Life sucks without you.”

This statement says a lot about your friendship with them. It's not an apology; it goes a long way to show that you can't do most things without your best friend. You can't go clubbing, partying, studying, or on a food spree to eat random stuff without them.

It means every decision you make during your misunderstanding is not good, and it brings a sad feeling to you. This is one statement you should make if they don't want to talk about it. They may be hurt, but when you say this, you lighten their heart even though they may not say it.

4. “Let me know if you need anything.”

Sometimes, after a fight, after you apologize, your best friend may not want to talk to you for specific reasons. If they do this, don't force them; give them time to accept your apology in their hearts and come around. 

Of course, you may be speechless or clueless on what to do next, but saying "Let me know if you need help" assures them that even though you know they're mad at you, you're still willing to offer help whenever they need you. This is one of the best things you can say to your best friend after a fight.

5. “I miss our laughter.”

Best friendship is not something that comes up from nowhere. It's a thing two people build together. Like a relationship, friendships involve compromises, laughter, good times, and sacrifices from the two individuals. After a fight, you could tell your best friend you miss laughing with them.

You could bring back good old memories you both created together before the fight. Say them in detail, so you can bring back the good feeling you both had when it happened. Tell them new funny events that occurred, where you couldn't find any other person like them to laugh with. This is one nice thing to say after a big argument or fighting with your best friend.

6. “There's a story I need you to hear.”

Friendship is also about talking and laughing about funny things with the person you trust. Most friends love to hear stories, especially when they're sure of the source and it's from their best friends. If they pay deaf ears after you apologize, try introducing a story. An exciting story you know they can't resist.

Stories have a way of bonding or reuniting every relationship, including friendship. It doesn't have to be a true story; it could be your way of describing what you did in the third-person perspective and using the same opportunity to apologize to them. It's one of the steps you can use to reconcile with your friend after a fight.

7. “How do I make it up to you?”

When you offend your friend, you should find a way to make it up to them. If they're so mad at you that they make you clueless, give them some time off and ask them how you can make it up to them. If this is too hard to ask in person, you can send it as a text to them.

If possible, give them good options to pick from. Remember you hurt them, so you should give them the free will to choose what you should do to reconcile with them. The truth is, when you ask this, no matter how bad the argument is, they'll respond to you.

8. “How have you been?”

After hurting your best friend's feelings, you may want to catch up on how well or sad they've been while you were away. That's what friendship is about. You may have been apart for quite a lengthy period, and it will be a good feeling for them to know you still care to know how they've been faring.

So, you could ask random specific questions to hear what they have to say. They may be reluctant at first, blame you for not being around to support them when they needed you, or generally say things to make you feel guilty.

9. “Let's go and have some drinks.”

let's go and have some drink

It may not be going out to have drinks, depending on your friend and the situation you both find yourselves in. You could both go to the park, cinema, or a random spot you both chose as your favorite spot to visit. Saying this to your friend is like telling them you missed hanging out or going places with them.

You may not know this, but it will go a long way to show how sorry you are and how willing you are to make things work once again between both of you as best friends. You could volunteer to pay for the drinks or cover any expenses you both incur.

10. “You inspire me.”

Best friendships are beautiful, especially when the two individuals have each other's backs. If you tell your friend that they inspire you after a quarrel caused by an argument, unconsciously, you create a stronger friendship bond. That's you letting them know how much you cherish your friendship.

Like you increase a person's feelings when you say nice things to them in a relationship, you create the same impact in your friend's life when you say this to them. Every friend wants to know how much you appreciate them, and this statement will only make them want to do more for you.

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11. “Can we talk a bit?”

This is one question that you may most likely not receive a response for. So, you don't have to ask them literally like this, they're your best friend, and you know them more. This means you could use words or sentences you know they can relate to best.

Your best friend would always have a soft spot for you, no matter how bad your fight is. During the fighting period, they miss you too. The only problem is, some of them may not show it or may prove to be a bit stubborn just to see if you're really sorry about what you did.

12. “I'm still your best friend.”

Some hurtful things happen in a friendship, making people wonder if you're genuinely their best friend. They want to know if you still care about them or you're tired of being friends with them. 

"I'm still your best friend" is like telling them that no matter how bad or serious any situation may be, including the last one you resolved, they still remain your most valued friend. You're indirectly telling them not to turn their backs on you because of the little misunderstanding you both had. This is one of the things to say to your best friend after a fight.

13. “It's been a while since we created fun memories.”

Good friendship always has fun memories. Reminiscing them could help you both rekindle your friendship bond. Saying this to your friend means you don't only value them as your best friend, but cherish the memories you both had in the past.

You could start by saying the most exciting memory that is their favorite. Then gradually talk about the other ones that make you both happy when you talk about them. Memories go a long way to renew friendships, so if you ask them to create new memories, it's a faster way to make it up to them if you've really hurt their feelings.

14. “I still love you as my best friend.”

Friendship shouldn't be measured by the times you have ups and downs, the challenges you and your friend face together, or by the number of fights you both have. In this case, if your friend was more at fault during a fight, and they feel bad about it, let them know you still love them.

Furthermore, if you want to avoid an argument from coming up during an amicable discussion, where there's still a misunderstanding, you can say this to summarize and settle the problem once and for all. That's one of the things to say to your best friend after a fight.

15. “You don't look good when you're mad at me.”

This is a statement to cheer them up when you've taken responsibility for the wrong you did, and you've both settled. It's something to make you both laugh about how your friend reacted when they were pissed at you during the fight. 

It's your best friend, and you both have a strong friendship bond, so you should learn to tease each other and laugh about your fight after you've reconciled. This is one of the things to say to your best friend after a misunderstanding.

16. “Our friendship can't end because of this one thing.”

Sometimes, friends fight over meaningless things. It could be because one person wanted sunlight while the other preferred a dark room, or one friend was two minutes late for a hangout. It may not be anything provoking to a normal person, but it's always different with best friends.

Saying this to them means you both know it's something minor that happened, and you don't want to end your friendship because of it. You may not know, but it's a statement that would make them a bit emotional when they think about it. 

17. “Remember our exciting plans.”

In every friendship, the two individuals involved usually make plans to achieve or enjoy most things. For instance, they could have a planned trip to a specific country to take photos, have fun with the culture, or meet new people.

It could be to try a particular foreign dish or try a life-threatening adventure together. You may have had plans like these with your friend, and reminding them about your plans is also a way to say, "let's not ruin these new planned memories. It's going to be fun."

18. “I got you something.”

Most people love to receive gifts, and your friend may fall into the category of people that get excited when they see one. In that case, you could get them something little and beautiful with a lovely write-up to make them smile or laugh. 

They may not want to talk about your quarrel. So, you may want to buy your best friend a little gift after a fight, to seal any apology you made entirely, or just remind them you still care as you used to, before your big fight, especially if all other efforts fail. If you have this, it's a good thing to say to your friend after a misunderstanding.

19. “Can I sleep over at yours today?”

If you're best friends that love to spend time at each other's house to have karaoke, games night, or a random house party, this statement may just be one of the most thoughtful ones to say to your friend after a misunderstanding. That's because it could feel bad doing things without your friend.

Saying this to them is a way of trying to find out if things are back to normal between both of you. So, you're not directly asking if you're back as friends; you're using your friendship code to ask if you can do one of the fun things you usually do together.

20. “I don't feel good when we fight.”

Not everyone feels bad when they're fighting with their loved ones. Some feel people deserve silence for a while, especially when they think those people were the main cause of their disagreement. If you do the opposite with your best friend and tell them how bad you feel whenever you fight, it will go a long way to create a stronger friendship bond.

Tell them how disorganized knowing you're not on good terms during your period of disagreement. Let them know how boring it was to see a new movie or go to the games alone. It may sound insignificant, but this is one thing you can say to your best friend after a disagreement.

21. “I miss you.”

i miss you

No matter how angry your friend is, when you tell them how much you missed them during the fight, it will make them feel more special. It shows how much you love, value, or cherish the way they talk, the things they say to you, their manner of approach to something, and how you both relate with each other.

This could sum up any bad feelings and make you two reconcile fully in no time. It's also your little way to verbally and physically appreciate your friendship on a different level. This is one of the things you should tell your friend after a disagreement. 

22. “Let's take a walk.”

Exercises are known to boost happiness levels, especially after a bad argument that may have made you both say hurtful words to each other. So, you may not necessarily take a walk, but go out for some fresh air or to stretch a bit. You could go out for a cup of ice cream or smoothie.

That way, you both get to clarify things and talk about what happened in the little time you were apart. You could even see new things to laugh about and create new lovely memories together. Or you could tell them, "let's hang out for a bit."

23. “Don't forget; we're a team.”

Best friends do most things together, whether it's fun, serious, or regular activities. Those are the few things that make their friendship everything and more, including being a team of two. That means you can't attack one friend and expect the other to watch you quietly.

Saying this to your friend after an argument is more like you telling them you shouldn't be fighting each other or against one another, but together as a team. It makes everything a lot better and loosens the tension you may have after a fight.

24. “Should I apologize again?”

In every good friendship, there's always a tough friend to complement the calm one. If you're the tough one, that's good enough. If you're the calm one and you offend your tough friend, you may not get away with apologizing just once.

If you feel like they're not convinced about your words of remorse, you could ask them if you can do it again. Sometimes they may direct you on how to do it or advise you to let them be. But, asking your friend this question shows how fast you want to reconcile, how much you cherish the friendship, and it's one of the things to say to your best friend after a fight.

25. “I want us to fix this.”

If you both had an argument that made you quarrel and nobody seems to have a reason or know the main cause of the misunderstanding, this is something good to say to them. It will show how willing and open you are to fix things with them.

Don't say these words indirectly or expect them to understand your gestures. Remember, you both just got out of a fight, and you want to completely clarify things and restore your friendship to the way it was. Tell your friend you want to fix things as fast as possible so you two can get back to normal.

26. “You can punch me if you want.”

This is something you say when you know you've really messed up, and you contributed to a greater percentage of the fight between you and your best friend. It mainly applies if they keep quiet while you apologize. So, if you say everything they should react to, and they say nothing, tell them they can punch you if they want.

If you say this to your friend, and they're so pissed, they could do it, while some others may give you a funny look or just smile at it. Whatever they do, hearing this from you would help calm them down or make them say something either sarcastic or anything to express their anger.

27. “I don't want to lose this friendship.”

This is one of the most thoughtful things to say to your friend after a fight. They may interpret it in different ways, but the ultimate one remains that you love them so much, you're not ready to let them go despite the situation you both faced.

It means that through thick and thin, you'll always have a connection with them, and you're ready to sort any challenge you face together. It doesn't matter if the argument was slight or so serious it ended up in a quarrel; saying this to them will balance and improve your relationship the most, and it's one of the things to say to your best friend after a fight.

28. “I miss your encouragement.”

Most people get encouraged by their best friends, but this reduces to nothing when they start fighting or quarreling. Saying "I miss your encouragement" to your friend after a fight is one of the most amazing things they can hear from you. 

It shows them they're not just wasting your time, but they add more value than they think. It means you miss their motivating words and can't wait to hear them after complete reconciliation. It may mean nothing to you, but it will be a big deal to them and encourage them to keep contributing to your life after your fight. 

29. “You're amazing, and I'm sorry for letting you down.”

If you did something unusual that left them surprised or disappointed, like not supporting them when they had high hopes that you will, or when they counted on you to have their backs, and you didn't go without any reason, you should show remorse for letting them down.

Telling your friend how amazing they are and taking the blame for not being as reliable as you should've been is one of the bravest steps to restore your friendship fully. That way, you don't hurt their feelings any further; instead, you increase the trust, love, and loyalty between both of you. 

30. “I feel terrible for acting the way I did.”

i feel terrible for acting the way i did

It's one thing to apologize to your friend, but another thing to feel remorseful for anything you did to them. If you caused the fight with your actions or words, let them know how bad you feel for behaving that way. It will go a long way to mend things further.

Sometimes they may not want to hear an apology, but just to know you understood what you did was wrong. It's a way of you taking responsibility for being at fault. Saying these words could make everything right. "I feel terrible for acting the way I did" is one of the things you can say to your best friend after a fight.

31. “I promise not to hurt you this way ever again.”

After a fight with your best friend, one of the best things to say to them is to promise them never to repeat the same mistakes to hurt them. Even if it repeats in the future, at that moment, assure them you would try your best not to let it happen anymore.

It's also a way to avoid having an argument or hurting their feelings more. It means you promise them that you'll take care and try your best not to make this type of mistake in the future. That encourages them to give the friendship a chance and let the reason for the fight go.


What do you say to someone after a fight?

The first thing to say to someone after a fight, whether big or small, is "I'm sorry," which is the easiest way to apologize. Depending on how close you are to them, you could say other friendly or sorry things to make them happy or lighten the atmosphere.

How do you talk to a friend after a fight?

It's better to do it in person if that's favorable enough for you. You could also do it on call or the closest means you can use to reach out to them. Apologize to them if you mean it from your heart. If you have any explanation, that's a good time to do it, because they'll be calm enough to listen. 

Should I text first after a fight?

It depends on the kind of person you are. If you miss the person you fought with, and you're not petty, you could text first after a fight. In most cases, the mature thing to do is reach out because sometimes you realize you fought for the wrong reasons or misunderstood each other.

How do I apologize to a friend I hurt?

You could prepare your words in advance. Give details and reasons to make them understand why you did what you did. Talk to your friend amicably, and don't make it an argument or debate, so it doesn't turn into a new conflict. Be patient afterward to hear what they have to say.

Do best friends fight?

Yes, best friends fight. That's what makes every friendship grow and become stronger. Best friends argue with each other more than they do with others. Sometimes, they fight over the littlest things, but the good thing is, they become closer whenever they do.

In Conclusion

There are numerous things to say to your best friend after a fight or an argument. If you don't know how to handle it or which direction to go, you can use the 31 things I've mentioned for a start. I hope you liked this article. If you did, please drop a comment and share it with others.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.

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