Signs He Only Sees You As A Friend (29 Not-So-Obvious Signs)

Last updated on June 12, 2024 by Michelle Devani

Do you have strong feelings for a guy? Are you unaware whether he feels the same?

It’s a shame to say it, but it’s not always obvious whether a guy wants you just as a friend or something more. It’s common that men will hide their feelings, either not to hurt yours or because they enjoy the validation they receive from leading a woman on.

Of course, it’s important for a woman to get to the bottom of this as soon as possible. 

That’s why I wrote this guide featuring the most common signs that a man has no romantic feelings towards a woman and only sees her as a friend. 

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However, it’s not the only solution. There are plenty of behavioral clues that he’ll give away if he only sees you as a friend - and these signs are listed in the article below.


29 Signs He Only Sees You As A Friend

It's nice to meet some you like; he meets your standard and is the type of guy you would love to date or be in a relationship with. You think he's someone you can flow with, have a proper conversation, and can have any fun with.

With all these in check, it feels like he doesn't seem to be on the same page as you. No matter the kind or manner of move you make, he still treats you as a friend. Some days he looks like he's really into you, while other days, it feels like you don't even exist.

It could be frustrating, especially if you're in love with him and want to be more than friends. He doesn't seem to have a love interest or romantic feelings for you even though you think you'll both make a cute couple.

If you're in the middle of knowing if this man is into you, would ask to be in a relationship with you sooner or later, or he just sees you as a normal friend to hang out with, keep reading to know 29 signs if he really has feelings for you or sees you as a friend.

1. He plays with you like a normal friend

A man who is in love with a woman would choose subtle things to do. He could take you out for a roller coaster ride, karaoke, simple games, or something he knows would stress you less if you indulge in it. 

If you see yourself playing with him as his guy friend, that's a sign he doesn't see you as a potential lover. So he could throw a pillow at you when you say a joke instead of smiling, pinching your cheeks, and saying something adorable. That's one of the signs he only sees you as a friend.

2. Even when you make the first move, he won't be interested

Any guy who has romantic feelings for you would not wait for you to make the first move. Even if he does, he'll stick to you and try to make things easier. He'll do all the possible things he can to make sure he doesn't lose you to another man.

When a man is not into you, he won't be interested no matter what you do. Even if your body language is as straightforward as possible and you're the nicest girl to him, he would barely recognize your effort. If you experience this in any way, it's one of the signs he wants normal friendship.

3. He'll freely flirt with you

When you meet a sweet guy, one of the signs he likes you is, he won't have the confidence to flirt with you, openly the way he flirts with other girls. He'll filter his words and actions and avoid doing anything to piss you off, to show his best behavior. 

It doesn't happen that way when he sees you as a normal friend. He'll flirt with you openly without caring much and may probably use offensive words because of how relaxed he is with you. If he does this with you, that's one of the signs he wants nothing more than friendship.

4. You're never in his future plans

You tend to hear your name in a man's future when he's in love with you. He'll ask for suggestions and ideas on how to achieve his goals or make personal decisions. You'll be a part of most of his plans, and that's how you know he likes you.

But, you barely hear his plans, not to think of hearing your name in them when you're nothing but a friend to him. Even when you tell him about your plans, defining them with him included, they don't value it as much as you would think. That's a sign he sees you as a friend.

5. He'll set you up with one of his guy friends

Any man who has an interest in making you his girlfriend would be skeptical about introducing you to his male friends. Instead, he would make sure to make you fall in love with him first, knowing you're his, before going ahead to introduce you to them.

If a guy is not into you, he'll try to hook you up with one of his friends. He'll organize hangouts, parties, get-togethers, and casual dates with a group of friends to set you up with one of them, not minding how you'd feel about their plans. That's a sign a guy sees you as a friend.

6. He'll not show signs he likes or has feelings for you.

he'll not show signs he likes or has feelings for  you

Guys would do anything to show how much they want to be in a relationship with you if they find you attractive and intelligent enough to be with them. Their words, actions, body language, and eye contact will tell it all. And their conversations with you would always head in that direction.

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When he wants just friendship with you, he'll be clear about his feelings as often as he can. He'll let you know he sees you as a normal female friend to avoid sending out mixed signals. If you keep hearing this from him, it's a sign he's not interested in dating you.

7. His pet names won't be romantic

Guys are used to giving girls pet names, especially when they see her as a special person. They will come up with the cutest ones, derived from her name, a favorite character they love, or anything beautiful and adorable she reminds them of.

When a guy sees you as a friend, he doesn't put much thought into pet names. He'll call you by your name, and if possible, may mistakenly refer to you by one of the names he calls his male friends. When you see this from him, that's one of the signs he sees you as his normal female friend.

8. You'll both discuss random topics unrelated to relationships

It's normal to discuss different topics with a man when they're into you. They could talk about games, family, politics, and many other things, but they'll never forget to talk about being in a relationship with you once in a while. Hearing this from a guy is one of the signs he likes you and would want you as his girlfriend.

The opposite happens when he wants platonic friendship. If he has time to have a conversation or two with you, he'll freely talk about many things with you but would avoid talking about dating you in any way he can. That's one of the signs he only sees you as a friend.

9. He advises you on what to do when you're in a relationship

Any man who truly wants to be with you would tell you about himself. He'll always talk about his likes and dislikes. He'll guide you on what to do in the future when you're both in a relationship. A guy who doesn't want friendship would tell you how he'll want you two to be when you start dating.

Someone who sees himself as your guy friend would advise you on how to act when you decide to be in a relationship. This means he's not feeling you as a potential girlfriend, and he doesn't plan or dream of seeing himself dating you.

10. There'll be no date plans

there'll be no date plans

Dates are the best when guys love a girl. They will come up with different date ideas, and if you don't like them, they'll ask you to suggest some that go with your love language. A man would do this and try his best to know it works out fine.

Of course, no guy would organize or invite you on a date when he doesn't have feelings for you. No matter how much you try to give clues, talk about other couples and how they hang out or even make plans expecting him to understand your message. If he does this, that's a sign a guy likes you as a normal friend.

11. He introduces you to people as his friend

Guys introduce girls they want to date to other people with the sweetest words they can use. They would take her to meet their friends, a few family members, or people they love. They would be eager for her to hang out or become familiar with them.

But, when a guy is not into you, he'll barely notice you exist. He may not even bother to make an introduction, and if he does, it will be as casual as possible. A man who sees you as a friend and not a potential lover would introduce you to people only when he bumps into you while hanging out with them.

12. You reach out first most times

Most guys don't have any problem reaching out to a girl first, but that's if they like her so much that they can't help but hear from her as often as possible. They would send messages, call, and sometimes come to see you just to have face-to-face conversations.

The direct opposite happens when they see you as one of the normal girls they talk to. They may only pick, return a call or respond to a message only when they feel it's important. For instance, you want to tell them details of a particular event, ask logical questions or something of such.

13. He won't try to act perfectly with you

Every man who wants to be with a girl in a relationship would put the effort in his own way to make sure he comes out perfect for you. He would work on his physical appearance, speaking skills, and how he relates with people to make you proud and see him as worthy.

But, if he ignores his outfits, his behavior around you or in public, without feeling uncomfortable or apologizing for his actions, it means he doesn't care much about being in a relationship with you. That's a sign he sees you as a mere female friend.

14. Group hangouts would be his preference

You find yourself going on dates, hanging out, and enjoying private moments with a guy who is genuinely into you. He would do his best to make sure you're comfortable, and you both spend time together without a third party.

You know, a guy only sees you as a friend when he keeps inviting you to hang out with a group of friends or many group events, where everyone participates. He never cares about having a private moment with you. If a man keeps doing this, it's a clear sign he only wants friendship with you.

15. He'll openly check out another girl and talk to you about them

Even if a man who likes you is a lover of many girls, he'll never check out another girl openly, not to talk of telling you about them. He'll hide them and try not to talk about them to avoid hurting you. That's one of the signs to show a guy likes you.

You'll hear about a random girl who just came into the room a few minutes if a guy doesn't see you more than a friend. He may even ask your opinion about the woman and clues on how to talk to her. That's a sign he only sees you as a friend.

16. Every other thing is more important than you

You become a man's priority above other things when he likes you and would do anything to win your heart. He'll find time in his busy schedule to call and check up on you or go on a date with you. He could even cancel appointments to make sure he spends time with you.

The opposite happens with a guy who only sees you as a friend. He would try to shorten your call or time together to make it to something else. Or, he may have to leave your house early to hang out with friends and have fun. It may sound minor, but it's one of the signs he's not interested in you.

17. He never compliments you as you do to him

Most guys would take their time to reciprocate complimenting you, your outfit, and your behavior if they like you. They wouldn't mind doing it as long as it makes you happy and you're comfortable with it. And they'll be so pleased to hear you compliment them.

But, if they don't like you enough or are not having any thoughts to be in a relationship, they'll barely compliment you. Even though you make it a regular thing to compliment them, so they know the right thing to do, they may not appreciate and understand it the way you want them to. That's one of the signs he sees you as a friend.

18. You rarely hear about his successes first

you rarely hear about his success first

Sometimes a guy's family, friends, or loved ones may not get to hear about their successes, but you could if he really likes you. He'll make sure to invite you over for a celebration to join him in his happy moment.

So, if he celebrates promotion at the office, you may never get to hear it, except his friends spill the news to you in excitement. He may forget or choose not to tell you because you're not that special to him. If you experience this a few times, it's one of the signs he sees you as a friend.

19. He's not as supportive as he should be

When a guy wants to be in a relationship with you, he'll always volunteer to help you one way or the other. He'll try to help you accomplish your goals and dreams financially and otherwise. And if he can't, he'll do his best to give you listening ears.

But if he has no feelings for you, his level of support will be low, and he may not put any effort into helping you find solutions to a problem. If you like a guy who behaves this way with you, it's one of the signs he only sees you as a friend.

20. Whenever you complain, he won't put much thought into it

A guy who likes you would read your body language to know if you're okay or not. He won't want you to complain, and if he does, he'll listen to you with maximum attention and many words to solve the situation or comfort you.

If you don't mean anything to him, he won't care about most things you say. He may look at you as a nag or someone who's not appreciative of life. Even when he listens, he won't have much to say or do to help. That's a sign you're just a friend to him.

21. He overlooks little details about you

A man would notice the color of lipstick that suits you, your different styles of dresses, and how well they add to your looks as a whole if he has a special interest in you. He may rarely say them, but deep down, he appreciates everything you do to make things right.

When a guy sees you as a friend and not a potential lover, he wouldn't observe little details about you. He could go as far as remembering irrelevant things or observing other people in your surroundings, but he'll pay little or no attention to you. That's a sign he's not interested in a relationship with you.

22. There'll be no romantic eye contact

Whenever you're with a man that likes you more than he would like a friend, you'll feel it in your gut, especially by the way he looks at you. Of course, it's normal to look at someone, but there'll be something special about his eye contact and how long he'll maintain it.

The guy you like who doesn't want you back would not have that kind of special moment with you. Instead, he may spend his time looking at his phone or probably fall asleep if you both don't have anything to talk about. That's one of the signs he only sees you as a friend.

23. He talks about your beautiful friends

It's normal if a guy takes your friends out, treats them right, and asks you how they're all doing once in a while. A man who likes you would only remember to ask about your friends as a courtesy to know how they're doing and get through to your heart.

When he doesn't care so much about you or doesn't see you as someone he would want to be in a relationship with; he would always ask about your female friends, particularly the ones he has his eyes on. Doing this to you means he only sees you as a friend.

24. He treats you like he'll treat his guy friend

he treats you like he'll treat his guy

You'll never see a guy who truly likes you and wants to be in a relationship with you; treat you any less like a queen. He may inconvenience his friends just to make you comfortable. And he may never use the same approach he uses with his guy friend to relate with you.

So, if you notice a man you like treat you, talk, or play with you as he would do with his guy friend, without feeling weird about it, be rest assured he has no romantic feelings for you. And that's one of the signs he only sees you as a friend.

25. You never chat for long or talk on calls

Talking to a man who likes you is like seeing an exciting film without having to respond so much in return. It doesn't matter if it's on a call or a chat; you can both talk for hours without feeling time pass by. You both won't have to force any conversation. You'll flow from one topic to another.

But, trying to stay connected to a guy who doesn't want to be in a relationship with you is like forcing things. He wouldn't want to spend a lot of time with you, and he'll always have excuses for cutting the calls short or responding to your messages late.

26. He avoids flirting with you in public

Being with a man that sees you as his potential future lover means experiencing some flirting in public. It doesn't mean they'll do it all the time or annoyingly to piss you off. But, he'll make you feel special and prove to everyone that you're his, even if you're not.

A man who only wants friendship with you would avoid flirting with you in public. He would try everything possible to let people know you're not in a relationship and may correct if people think you're a couple. That's a sign he only sees you as a good friend.

27. There'll be no romantic teases

You would experience many teasing sessions from a man who wants more than friendship with you. He'll tease the little things you do and mimic how you talk, walk, and your behavior in general, but make sure you have a good feeling about it. That's one of the signs he likes you.

Don't expect teases from a man that gets annoyed at most things you do, sees your actions as childish or doesn't make any cute comments when you act a certain way. If a man is this rigid without feeling bad about it afterward, it's a sign he only sees you as a platonic female friend.

28. He'll introduce you to a girl he likes

Guys would stop talking to any other girl when they're with you if they like you. They would sound as formal as possible when they receive calls from other girls. That's because they don't want you thinking they have other options of girls to date.

On the contrary, when a guy is not into you, he doesn't care who he communicates with when you're around. If a girl they like comes around, they'll introduce you to her without any feeling of guilt. If he does it, better believe that all he wants is friendship with you.

29. He doesn't care to know more about you

You'll notice how much a man will interrogate you when he likes you. He'll ask questions about yourself, your career, family, and many things you may be feeling reluctant to talk about. A man who wants to be in a relationship with you will want to know many details about you.

If you notice, he doesn't care about knowing more about you, or he zones out whenever you start talking about yourself without him asking. You may also observe he takes anything you say without asking questions; that's a sign he sees you only as a friend.


How do you know if he only sees you as a friend?

If a guy sees you as a friend, he'll avoid saying anything or looking serious about being in a relationship. He won't show so much interest even if you make a move to express your feelings to him. He'll randomly talk about another girl and sees it as nothing.

How do you tell if he's interested or just friendly?

When a guy is interested, he does everything and goes out of his way to make sure you're okay. He'll check up on you as often as he can and would ask to help whenever you're in need. In contrast, a friendly man wouldn't be as attached as he has an interest in other things.

How do you know if you’re just friends?

He would sound too casual when you're together. That means he'll act like you're one of his guy friends and compliment you just the way he'll compliment them. When people call you a couple, he'll consciously correct them that you're just friends. Sometimes, he may set you up with one of his friends.

How do you tell if a guy likes you more than a friend?

His body language will tell whenever he's with you. His eye contact will be different with you compared to others. He'll always want to be with you and involve you in his future plans. He tries to spend quality time and support you in the best way he can.

Why has my male friend become distant?

Either he has developed romantic feelings for you and is afraid to say it because he's not sure you're both on the same page, or he's found a love interest in a girl he'll like to have as his girlfriend, hence, the sudden distance.

In Conclusion

Sometimes, it may be hard to know if someone truly likes you or he's with you like a guy friend. But, if you follow the 29 signs I've mentioned, they can guide you for a start. Did you like this article? If yes, please drop a comment and share it with others.

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Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.

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