Things To Say To Your Mom When She's Mad At You (19 Comforting things)

by Michelle Devani

When you have a misunderstanding with your parents, the words you use in the heat of the moment can either soothe or aggravate things. It is, therefore, crucial to know the best things to say during and after a disagreement with your mom. 

Your relationship with your mother would have its ups and downs from time to time. How you handle those issues would be critical to your future relationship together. 

If you've made a mistake and you're looking for the most practical apology, we're here to help. Here are nineteen excellent things to say to your mom when she's mad at you. 

19 Things to Do and Say to Your Mom When She's Mad at you

1. Admit you were wrong

admit you were wrong

Whenever a parent has a fight with their kid, they always expect them to realize their wrongdoings. This notion is especially true when you argue with your mom. As a guardian, she feels she knows the difference between right and wrong. Therefore, failing to accept a negative behavior would make her angry.

Explaining that you were wrong will instantly patch up the relationship you have with her. It'll let her know that you care about her and are mindful of how your behaviors affect her. Tell her something like, "I'm sorry; I was wrong. I only wanted to pass my message across, but I'll use a different approach next time. Please can we let bygones be bygones?"

2. Tell her you're unhappy

No matter how angry mothers get, their child's happiness means the world to them. Tell your mother you're unhappy about her anger, and this might push her to make amends. It will serve as an appropriate apology for the disagreement because you're communicating how important she is to you.

You can tell her something like, "I know you're mad at me, but this distance between us is causing me pain. You're important to me, and I don't particularly appreciate fighting with you. Can we try to sort things out? Can you forgive me, please?" These words will make her understand that your happiness lies in reconciling with her. 

3. Talk about how she feels

A good way to apologize when you disagree with someone is to admit that you didn't consider their feelings. You might have said some things you didn't mean at the moment, or perhaps, acted out of impulse. Tell them that the scenario was a mistake and you didn't mean to offend them. 

This scenario helps them move past the incident and forgive you thoroughly. It also works when you have a misunderstanding with a parent. Tell your mom, "I didn't think about how you would feel before acting that way. I'm sorry. Please can you forgive me?" Such a statement will melt your mom's heart and would help her see your point of view.

4. Appreciate her

The easiest way to quench your mom's anger is by appreciating her. Let her know how much you value her efforts and contributions to your life. If she constantly gives you advice, thank her for it. If she supports you with her time, energy, or resources, make her feel valued. This activity will make her consider forgiveness rather than staying angry at you. 

You should tell her something like, "You do a lot for me, and I appreciate you deeply. I might look ungrateful, but I can't survive without the little things you do. I'm sorry for acting negligently. Please forgive me. I'll try to act differently from now on." Statements like this would build harmony between the both of you. 

5. Talk about listening to her more

When someone's mad at you, they primarily want you to listen to them. They tend to feel unheard and misunderstood, which is why it's essential to engage in this next step. If you want to apologize to your mom, the best thing to do is affirm that you need to listen to her more. 

Mothers want their kids to love and respect them, but more importantly, they want to be valued and appreciated. If you disregard her statements, she's bound to get angry. Therefore, tell her, "I promise to listen to you more. I misbehaved, and I'm truly sorry for how my behaviors affected you." This statement will make her see things differently and, perhaps, seek reconciliation.

6. Tell her you finally understand her

tell her you finally understand her

Having a fight with a parent can take a toll on the relationship you have with them. Nonetheless, it's critical to think thoroughly and get a clearer picture of everything. In most cases, you might find out that your parents have your best interest at heart. 

If you suddenly realized that your mother was only doing what she thought was best for you, you have to communicate this to her. Let her know that you finally understand her, and this might unite both of you. 

You can tell her something like, "I stayed up all night trying to understand why we keep fighting, and I finally understood it. You only want what's best for me, and sometimes, I don't see it that way. Can you forgive me?"

7. Talk about your mistake

You can seek forgiveness from someone mad at you by talking about your mistakes honestly. Don't underplay or disregard them. Instead, treat them as critical avenues to solving the problem. This process would serve as an extraordinary apology to someone angry at you. More so, it will help both of you make amends. 

For example, if you annoyed your mom, tell her, "I was wrong for leaving you at that party without saying goodbye. I thought you knew I was leaving. Please forgive me. I won't act that way again." Being direct about your mistakes will help you and her patch things up faster than you expected. This method is better than acting oblivious to the actual matter. 

8. Mention what she might be going through

You need to acknowledge what your mom might be going through because of the disagreement. It would help if you didn't solely focus on her anger at the moment. She might be feeling sad or depressed that she's having problems with you, which is why it's critical to consider other factors. 

You can help your mother get through this phase by talking about her problems. You can tell her something like, "I know I made you unhappy, and I can't imagine what you might be going through. Please can you forgive me? It wasn't my intention to cause you any pain." These words will comfort her and ring harmony between both of you. 

9. Talk explicitly about your misdeeds

We tend to contribute directly or indirectly to most disagreements we find ourselves in. Our acts or inactions can infuriate the other person, even if it's not intentional. Therefore, it's critical to analyze the situation to know how to solve it. For example, ask yourself questions like, did I raise your voice while talking? Did I fail to act when I should have? Did I say something wrong?

The more you expressly acknowledge your mistake and talk about it, is the higher your chances of reconciling with the person. This process is mainly what a parent would like to hear amid a disagreement. They want you to apologize by stating your wrongdoings.

10. Tell her you were too harsh

It's possible to talk harshly when arguing with your parents. This process might aggravate the situation and make them angry at you. You have to evaluate everything you said during the misunderstanding to ensure that you didn't speak in a hostile manner. If you realize that you did, the only solution is to admit your wrongdoings. 

Say something like, "I realized that I was too harsh on you. I shouldn't have said the things I did. I'm completely sorry for my behavior, mom. You can give me any other punishment, but please don't stay angry at me any longer."

11. If you lied, come clean about it

Parents dislike when their kids are untruthful to them. It makes them feel unintelligent and underappreciated for their efforts. Being dishonest can also ultimately stir up disagreements or resentment. Therefore, if you want to mend the relationship between you and your parents, you have to come clean about your lies. 

If your mom is mad at you for lying to her, tell her, "I'm sorry for being untruthful. I felt you wouldn't understand me, so I decided to keep the situation to myself. However, I never expected it would resort to this. I'll try my best to prevent this scenario from happening again." Your sincerity will make her understand things better and possibly want to patch things up with you. 

12. Try a positive approach

Using a positive approach to someone angry at you can help calm the situation. You can say something light and conversational or decide to change the subject to something positive carefully. You can even choose to tell a joke. Understanding what will work well on your mother will guarantee you more success. 

The best apology to her can be something like, "I love you a lot and would never want to piss you off. If we're constantly fighting, who's going to prepare delicious meals for me? I can't stay without you, or I'd starve. Please can we be friends again? I promise to be good from now on." These statements might pacify your parents and make her consider reconciliation. 

13. Talk about unmet expectations

Disagreements are bound to occur when someone doesn't meet certain expectations. It could also be the reason why your mom is angry at you. Therefore, talking about this subject can help both of you make amends. If she was disappointed by your behaviors, bringing this to light will help her forgive you.

Say something like, "I know you expected me to get the groceries today, but I disappointed you. I'm sorry about that. Next time, I'll try my best to finish up my errand before leaving the house." These words will melt her heart and help her see things differently. She'll see the reasons for your behaviors, which will dispel her frustration. 

14. Ask her how to make things better

Asking for your mom's opinion after a fight will make her consider forgiveness. She'll perceive your efforts to make the situation better and contribute to building peace and harmony. This tactic works because an angry person often feels misunderstood. If you give the person an avenue to express themselves, they'll cool off much faster.

You can tell her something like, "How can I make things better between us? What's your ideal solution to the problems we've been having? Is there something you want me to do that I've not been doing? I want to know how we can settle our differences." This type of statement is compassionate and shows your zeal to make amends. 

15. Let her know she's right

Parents have a special connection with their kids and try to do what's best for them. When their offer to help is neglected or declined, they might feel underappreciated, which would cause them to get angry. If this scenario occurred with a parent, you need to soothe them by admitting they were right. 

All parents crave to play an essential role in their kids' lives. Therefore, giving them that opportunity will make them happy. This process can be a means to apologize if you've neglected their advice in the past. Tell them something like, "I know you have my best interest at heart. You were right all along, and I'm sorry for not listening."

16. Tell her, "I love you."

Affirming your love can fix the situation you have with a parent. Make them realize how important they are to you, and they might consider forgiving you. Your sweet statements will make them overlook your misdeeds and see how much you care for them. If they can recall your affection towards them, they'll work on saving their relationship with you.

You can mention something like, "I'll always love you, and you'll always have a special place in my heart. No matter how angry you get, I'll never stop valuing you. I hope you can consider forgiving me for everything that made you upset." 

17. Tell her you've learned your lesson

tell her you've learned your lesson

The most soothing phrase an angry mom wants to hear is, "I won't do it again." Telling her you won't make the same mistakes is a great way to appease her when she's angry. This process shows how remorseful you are about the situation and how badly you want to impress her.

In the heat of the argument, say something like, "I'm sorry for acting the way I did. I promise I won't repeat these behaviors. I might make mistakes from time to time, but I'll try my best to impress you truly. Please can you forgive me?" This statement will communicate your effort to make her happy, which will undoubtedly bring both of you closer together.

18. Let her know how broken you are without her

If you have a special relationship with your mom, and the distance between you is affecting you, you should communicate this to her. Tell her how much you want to make amends irrespective of the problems between the both of you. Share your grief about the situation and try to convince her to forgive you.

You can tell her something like, "I know I have a temper, and I tend to think irrationally. But I'm completely broken that we've been fighting. You mean the world to me, and I never want to lose you because of a disagreement. Can we work on our differences, please? I'm sorry for everything." 

19. Tell her how much she means to you

When you've exhausted all your options on pacifying your mom, tell her how much she means to you. Mothers tend to have a peculiar bond with their kids', meaning that your sweet statements are likely to move her more than you expect. 

Mention how she's your world, and you wouldn't survive without her. The more sincere your phrases are, the better your chances of reconciliation. It would also serve as a suitable apology for a mistake that got her angry. 

You can tell her something like, "Mom, you mean the world to me, and I would never directly try to hurt you. Please don't stay mad at me. I can't bear it any longer. Can you forgive me?"

FAQs

How do I make my mom happy when she's upset?

The best way to make a parent happy when they're upset is to appreciate them for their efforts. Ask for their opinions on solving the problems, or own up to your misdeeds if you hurt them. These steps will communicate your efforts to make them smile, which they'll appreciate.

What do you do when your mom is always mad at you?

If your mom is regularly upset with you, you need to find out the reasons. Perhaps, there's a severe communication issue between both of you that you need to handle. It could also be that you're not listening to her enough. Talking to your parents about this subject will bring more resolution. 

How do I calm my angry mom?

The first step to calming an angry parent is to give them space. After they've cooled off a bit, apologize for any wrongdoing and ask them for their opinion in making things better. Listen to what your mom says at this point because it will be critical to building harmony between you.

How do you show your mom you're mad at her?

If you're mad at your mom, try to communicate this to her politely. Be specific about the actions that made you angry, and include your expectations from her. This honest and transparent communication will promote peace instead of bringing disagreements.

Why do I cry when my mom cries?

If you have a close relationship with your mom, you're bound to feel the things she does. Your deep emotional connection with her will make you feel bad when she's going through pain. Therefore, you're likely to cry whenever she does. 

All In All

Did you enjoy this article? Remember that it's normal to have fights with a parent from time to time. Nonetheless, how you handle the situation is critical. You shouldn't yell at your mom even though you're mad at her. Instead, seek reconciliation at all times. Kindly leave a comment if you liked this article or share it with others. 

Michelle Devani
My name is Michelle Devani, and I've been helping people with their relationships since 2003. In 2017 I decided it was about time I started a blog on the topic, and since then more than 2 million people worldwide have read my relationship advice. Drop me a comment below to let me know what you think.

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